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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To, as an adult, not tell my parents I've had to take time off work for my health?

3 replies

Agix · 17/07/2024 10:05

Things have gotten on top of me and I've had to yet again take more time off work. I've been signed off for 6 weeks and am under the care of CMH. I've already taken 3 months off earlier this year, I'm really struggling. I have chronic illness and mental health issues. I've been given an additional diagnosis of CPTSD in the past month.

My father, ever since I was a child, never understood other people being unwell. He thought everyone was always faking (he himself was fit as a fiddle until the usual changes of old age). Mental health illness and "invisible" illness he's of course even worse with.

I can't be arsed telling him, which makes it hard as we are close otherwise and have fair contact.

I just don't want the bloody judgement and hassle whilst I am already worried about keeping my job, the lack of income, the risk to the good relationships with my lovely colleagues, the weight of this all on my partner, and of course my own health.

Would it be unreasonable to just not tell him again? I avoided him like the plague earlier this year. I'd probably have to outright lie again too as he always asks about work. I just can't take what he's like about it.

Just feel guilty as I just spoke to him and he asked about work, which I said was "fine!" and changed subject.

OP posts:
SingingSands · 17/07/2024 10:22

Just don't tell them. They don't need to know. Give yourself permission and give yourself peace.

Hope the time off helps you OP 💐

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 17/07/2024 10:25

You are an adult. You don't have to disclose your medical information to anyone except perhaps your employer and/or your insurance companies.

I hope that you feel better soon.

Octavia64 · 17/07/2024 10:26

Yeah my mum was and is the same.

I didn't tell her about most of my health issues because I know I'd just get the usual "the youth of today blah blah.

She's never been ill but hates those who have. Lack of moral fibre or something.

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