He is the most unmotivated person when it comes to doing anything with the children. I mean, he's hands on with caring for them and meeting their essential needs, but anything other than that and he always has an excuse or a reason or a moan about why it's not convenient and tries to kick the can down the road.
One of our DC has special needs which means they require a lot of time / attention. I'm very aware of the impact this will be having on our other DC who doesn't have special needs, so I try to foster good friendships with her peers and make an effort to go out and do things with/for her that doesn't involve our little one with SN. Otherwise she would miss out on a lot.
DD has become friendly with a little girl in the year above her at school and as a result OH has become friendly with her dad who is a lone parent, they've swapped numbers as it turns out they have a mutual hobby. Lovely!
So DD has been asking to arrange a play date outside of school so I nudge OH to sort something as he's the one who knows the dad and has his number, and actually the dad had already suggested OH and DD could go round to their house.
Oh the drama. So many bloody excuses and reasons why it's not convenient atm.
We had some crossed words about it and he relented and sent a message suggesting a park trip this coming Monday. The child's dad said that would be nice they'll go after school, all sorted and DD is happy.
Then OH realises that it's not the end of this week the kids break up from school, and the park trip would have to be after school and suddenly it's a no go. He doesn't mention that to me at the time.
The following day (today) he tells me that he's text the dad and said he thought they'd have broken up for the holidays by then so they should go at the end of the month or next month instead.. dispite DD already having been told and being excited. Cue one disappointed DD and the dad isn't texting back now as he's also probably thinking "wtf?"
So we've had a bit of an argument this morning, the long and the short of it for him is that its just not "conveeeeeenient" to do anything on a school day.
Hint, nothing ever is. He point blank refuses to do anything on a school day, even if he's off work himself, claiming there's no time. How do other families do it then?
I suggest Sunday afternoon as a compromise but that's not convenient either because he said he'll be tired from working Saturday night (he'll still get 7 hours of sleep if they go in the afternoon) and Sunday is 'bath night' for the kids so it'll be "too busy" and pushed for time.
What a fucking bore.
I'm due to go and sit in soft play this afternoon after work and school. I'm not doing it for my own entertainment, I hate soft play and the lighting gives me a migraine every time. I'm still going.. because it's not about me.
The mum of the little girl we're meeting there is a lone parent who works for the emergency services so she's ridiculously busy, yet she does so so much with her DD and has lots of activities on. If she can do all of that why can't he do something as simple as going to the park after school?
This seemingly small thing has seemed to have flipped a switch for me and I'm feeling really resentful. He has managed to get this far along because as you might have guessed it's always me doing the play dates, me arranging activities.
If he was a lone parent the kids would do absolutely nothing bar school and a very occasional hour in the park across the road once every six months.
Everything is too much bother for him unless booked months in advance at a time that suits him and nobody else.
Do you think I'm being unreasonable?