Not to go for this promotion?

[OurDoorz]

There's a job going at my work that's quite senior level and the boss for that job has asked me to apply. The thing is, I just don't think I want it.

Pros to the job :
More money (but not enough to get really excited about)
Quite a bit more prestigious / impressive

Cons to the job:
More boring than my current role (strategy, planning, leading a team, presenting externally and to management, approving documents etc)
Some difficult people on the team to manage without much help from our rubbish H.R. department
More stressful
Work friendships will change - most of my work pals are at my current level and there's an "us vs them" feeling about people the level above

AIBU to say thanks but no thanks? There's no "up or out" nonsense at my work and if I don't apply I can stay at my current level for the next ten years until I retire. My current role is very good - I earn six figures, don't have much stress and am the sole earner (DH is a house husband, we have lots of time together to relax, enjoy life, go on holidays, etc, no children) . I've always been quite ambitious which is why I'm doubting myself, but I feel like I've found the level where I'm happy and have good work/life balance.

YABU - lean in, keep climbing the ladder, shattered the glass ceiling, etc etc
YANBU - take this job and shove it 😂

what’s your pension like?

you’re mid fifties?
how old is your dh?

Being happy with your work/at work is priceless.

Could the promotion act as a stepping stone to other more interesting roles?

That's the only reason that I think might tempt me to apply in your position.

DH is a few years older than I am. My pension will be really good- not champagne and caviar on tap good but enough for a nice lifestyle with holidays, etc.

I think the promotion could only lead to even worse and more stressful roles, unfortunately 😂. It does seem madness to apply, doesn't it?

so he’s retired and receiving his pension

what does he think?

if you were 25, i’d say go for it

but with no children, a retired husband a good few years older than you…. i wouldn’t

Thanks for your replies. DH thinks I should do what I like. I'm 50 and he's mid-fifties but not in the best health. So yes I feel like my focus is elsewhere. If I were 25 and got this role I'd be on my way to big things but as it is, I just can't see much point.

I'll caveat this with the fact that I've never been ambitious in terms of work, but I don't see anything appealing about this role.

If you needed the money then obviously that's different. Or if you were younger and still building savings, replenishing them after buying property or things like family size were up in the air. But if you're on six figures with a decent pension and only ten years to retirement, basically everything except money is what matters.

As long as your position is stable and work will be fine with you not going for the promotion, I'd stick where you're happy!

“Everything except money is what matters” - I think you’ve hit the nail on the head, @ClonedSquare . Also prestige doesn’t matter - proving to the world I can do it when the world doesn’t care 🤣. And @SlippyYinzer yes being happy and not stressed at work is brilliant. I could give that up to be much less happy. It really doesn’t seem worth it. It’s such a difference from the way I used to think that it’s hard to wrap my head around, but I think it’s true. I’ve always believed I’m stepping out of my comfort zone but now I’m a little older I feel like I’m ready for a bit of comfort!

I bekieve you're being wise here OP- I think it's great to be ambitious, but ambition needs a purpose. If the promotion doesn't open (tempting) doors, provide interesting/worthwhile work or enhance your life in another way (money/flexibility etc), what is the point?

Yes I think you’re right - what is the point? My cons list is much shorter than my pros, after all. Thank you.

Being happy in your job is everything. I have long been of the opinion that being happy and creative in my work is the main thing for me - and that realisation came after a fair few years of having prestigious jobs with decent money... but that also came with hideous stress and having to manage some truly impossible people. It got to a point when even the good salary wasn't making up for the amount of shite I had to deal with.

Life is too short to be miserable at work if you have a choice not to be.

I agree - there's no good reason to choose stress and unhappiness if you have a choice. I won't be applying. Thanks again.