Firstly , I have spoken to the class teacher who has been understanding and agreed to keep the children apart . She’s part time and it seems that there wasn’t communication from the other teacher . Just really asking for advice on what to do if this continues and whether IABU on my thoughts .
There have been problems between my son and another child . A few weeks ago there was a physical altercation between my son and another child . The other child has had incidents with other children too and it appears he has displayed a lot of negative behaviour in class and his parents have been called in and things are being put into place for next year . During this altercation the other child hit my son , a few times , left a mark on his face . The argument started during a football game when the other child said my son had kicked him , so he then hit my child a few times. It was confirmed by other children that my son didn’t kick him on purpose , the school believe this to be the case and I do believe my son . I’m not one to just always side with my son , but he’s a very quiet boy usually. He’s never in trouble at school . He’s also very small and this other boy isn’t . My son has always been spoke of as a quiet child , and he’s like that at home . However - I do know that he can get competitive in football so I was very open minded about the situation but it was confirmed by a few different children ( to the teacher ) that it wasn’t intentional. I understood that to the other child he may not have taken it as an accident and I don’t blame him for this but I did think his retaliation was a bit much . However , both children were put on an internal exclusion for the afternoon. I didn’t think this was the right choice but it was all dealt with.
Last week , my son told me that this boy had been saying mean things to him and that the teacher had changed the seating plan and sat them on the same table . I messaged and asked if they could be moved . They agreed . After that , there was another incident. Now , I’ll start by saying that I know this might not be right but I have said to my child that if someone hits him , he is to hit back. I have said not at school , try to tell the teacher but I meant in a situation where someone was hitting him he would not be in trouble for hitting back to defend himself. However , there was another incident in class. This child was saying mean things and teasing my son so he argued back. The child hit him and kicked him a few times and walked away - as he walked away , my son hit him in his back . Both were in trouble . I did say to my child that hitting someone when they turned away is not the right thing - I understood that he was upset and had been hit but it’s not defence if this child had turned to walk away. I told him he had to accept the punishment . I spoke to school and said I accepted the punishment but I found out the part time teacher , in at the end of the week, had not been told I had asked them to be seperated - the previous incident was known to the head and the other class teacher so I’m really not happy.
My son is not like this and I’m upset that he has hit that child when he turned away as I fear that’s aggressive and not defence - I’ve not said this to him , but I do understand . I don’t want this to continue as I don’t want this progressing but I don’t really know what else to do as I’ve been very open with the school and I feel that they aren’t taking steps to stop this . I don’t want it continuing in the new year.