Is this how healthy relationships develop?

[notsuuure]

Hi all
So I'm 27 now and have always jumped into relationships very quickly. As in, I've been sure on them and almost obsessed from the first date (not overly healthy)
Anyway, my boyfriend and I broke up about 8 months ago and I've started seeing someone new recently. We've been on 6 dates and everything is lovely. Lots of green flags, he's attractive and a real romantic sweetheart. He's what I'm looking for and is doing everything right. However, I don't feel that initial obsession and desire to be around him all the time like I've had in past relationships, granted they've been quite toxic and codependent. We have a great time when we're out but I don't exactly count down the minutes until I see him if that makes sense. If anything I'm relieved to get some alone time. We were together for a date on Saturday and then watched the football together last night but by the time he left I was just happy to be on my own.
Somethings telling me I must just not like him that much but at the same time my friend is telling me that this is just a healthy start to a relationship and those feelings should develop over time.
Is this right? What are your opinions and how did your successful relationships start?

Mine and ex was fast but only lasted few years.
My now husband and I knew each other as friends. He knew my dc already. We had 1 date and he never went home, over 10 years together. Married with our dc. There has never been a red flag. And we've only ever had 2 arguments ever.

Hmmm... I found the opposite. When I felt lukewarm, the relationships never worked out. When I met my husband, I knew straight away.

I think you should be more loved up at this stage.

I knew him through my brother. I used to go out with the group simply to stop being in the house all the time. In time we became friends and went places together without the others. It didn't cross our minds that we were dating, we were friends. Someone else asked how our date went and it just seemed right. Been together nearly 40 years and still get on. Can't say it's been fairytale passion and romance but I'm with someone who loves me and who I love.

After only 6 dates??

I think it sounds perfectly normal and healthy. It's not healthy to feel obsessed with someone you've just started seeing, or to want to be with them ALL the time. When you've felt that intensity and obsession in the past, it hasn't really been based on anything real. At that point, you don't even know them very well. I think you're more likely to have healthier and more fulfilling relationships if you focus on building a solid foundation that allows for deeper feelings to grow overtime, and at that point, they will be based on something real.

This new guy may or may not be the one for you, but it certainly sounds like he's worth the chance, to see what might develop.

You would have more excitement to see him and be with him I think. It sounds like you're not that into him. But your normal tactic is very toxic and way more unhealthy.

It's really early days so you can't fully be yourselves, so it makes sense that you are happy for him to leave. I'd let this develop some more. At nearly 30 it isn't healthy to meet someone and pine for them when you aren't together. You're possibly just growing up, emotionally speaking.

I was absolutely besotted with DH, definitely not lukewarm. He was and is a lovely man and we're happily married many years later. I definitely knew it was something special.

I don’t think one way or the other is a normal way, it’s not a science and you don’t need to analyse it, you can take your time.

Your friend could be right or wrong, some relationships do develop like this but you also don’t need to settle for this guy just because you’re not obsessed with him and it feels more normal this time round.

You can still be desperate to see someone you fancy, in a healthy way, once I decided I fancied DP, I couldn’t get enough of seeing him.

What are your dates like? Just food and drink? If so why don’t you try and do something that brings out your personalities more, like an activity.