To tell him I've noticed the energy has shifted?

[legslgost]

Been dating a man for 2 months and things have been really good. We are supposed to go away together to Bath next weekend.

Within the few days or so, his energy has changed. Anyone in the dating world right now will understand this feeling.

Just small things. Fewer compliments, less talk of the future. No kisses at the end of his messages. Far far fewer messages than before. It's been like this for about 3 days. I've seen him in that time and while it was a nice evening, I also felt the difference then.

I did ask him (lightly referencing the change in energy), if he was sure about the weekend away. He said he absolutely was.

Since that discussion, however, he seems even more distant.

A male friend suggested just ignoring it and letting it unfold. Not to text him unless I hear from him and definitely not to ask him again about the weekend away, but to just let him get on with it and see what happens.

On the other hand, I hate the idea of him going on that weekend away with me under duress, or cancelling last minute. I'm not sure which is worse.

I'm not so desperately attached to him that my world would end if he didn't want to continue dating, but I would prefer he was upfront with me.

WWYD here?

So as not to drip feed - the weekend away involves going to the evening of a friend's wedding. It's actually a close friend, she's just only having family for the day part.

I cringe at the idea of taking him to the wedding and meeting my childhood friends, if he's one foot out the door. I'd much rather go alone.

Your friend is right.

I wouldn't take a guy I've been dating for only 2 months to a friend's wedding though.

It’s fizzling. I’d go and enjoy the wedding without him

Honestly ask him out right.

‘hey I’ve noticed an energy change, are you ok?’

If he is emotionally mature/available he will answer. There is nothing worse than the slow death.

3 months is normally when things fizzle out. Because the fantasy of meeting someone new and exciting wears off and real life sets in.

What ever you do - don’t take it personally. Look at what he can bring to the table and if it’s not consistency he isn’t good enough for you.

I feel two months is early to talk about the future with a partner. This sounds like a bad sign. Go to your wedding without him and enjoy yourself.

I'd pull back, go away for the weekend alone. Listen to your instincts. Wait for him to contact you.

I agree go alone and if he is into you pick up where you left off after.

Two months seems very soon to be planning a trip together and going to a wedding. Maybe he feels things are moving too fast so he's taken a step back?

I'd just go to the wedding alone. Maybe just be honest and say something like "I've noticed a shift in energy, and I'm not sure it's a good idea for us to go away together at this point. Although I am still happy to see where things go. Let me know if we're on the same page".

Cancel the weekend yourself, just say you’ve been thinking it’s too soon to introduce him to family. See what he says?

I think taking someone you’ve only known for a few weeks as your plus one is maybe a bit much. As you said yourself, you don’t want him in the wedding photos if he has one foot out the door.

If you’ve only known this man for two months, and already you feel something isn’t quite right, then don’t continue this relationship.

there could be a few things going on here, stuff he’s dealing with privately that may be affecting how much attention he can give you right now. But as you’ve only been seeing each other for 2 months it’s probably not a great sign. Years ago I had a similar thing and a male friend said something that has really stayed with me he said that (especially early on in a relationship), if a relationship is good and going somewhere, that it shouldn’t be hard, that it shouldn’t be filled with ‘does he like me’ etc. I truly believe this now, that if it’s meant to be it shouldn’t feel angsty. Maybe distance yourself a bit and see what happens.

Best interpretation is he said yes and now is nervous and has cold feet.

If YOU feel unsure about inviting him to meet your friends after two months, then OF COURSE he feels exactly the same. Why wouldn't he?

As in, you inviting him was conditional on feelings continuing. But have you discussed the future together not? Probably not, so can either of you be sure it's not the initial euphoric stage. Needs more time to make sure it's emotional and rational to progress.