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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To ask if you would view this as suitable/buy for a teen?

65 replies

aspiringyetshite · 11/07/2024 23:06

I'm working on a novel plotted around a woman who joins a socialist paramilitary group in an United Kingdom engulfed in unrest and lawlessness.

On the day of the dictatorial Prime Minister's assasination, she finds her comrade (I'll call her K, and her dead comrade I) shot outside in front of the barracks, with a swastika painted on the front door in her blood.

The bullet is very quickly traced to an Oswald Moseley style fascist (who I'll call P for this post's purposes) angry at K for stopping a massive car bombing during the Civil war.

Instead of killing K, he goes after her comrade I mainly to do mental harm to/break K, as he sees a broken, terrified K who will betray the cause as the end goal.

However, K quickly learns P is the uncle of J, a young teen sent by his mother to a New Red Army boot camp to 'toughen up'.

K volunteers at the boot camp with only one end goal - getting close to J's family to avenge I.

However when a massive attack is planned on that very boot camp, K must defend the children, herself and her comrades with her life, and her goal takes a complete turn.

This book would be targeted towards 12-16 year olds, have no sexual content (relationships such as marriage or boyfriend-girlfriend are existent, but only with two of K's comrades having a marriage and K herself falling in love with A, another female soldier, however the romance only exists to show K's attitude towards those she feels obliged to protect, even in her current mental state, and the relationship is largely platonic - nothing more than a peck on the cheek and discussions of future marriage)

It would however have quite a bit of violence, with K's end goal being the death of P, and a few scenes more.

I unfortunately think so far it a bit glamorises K - I'm doing my best to portray her as a fallible human being but my mind is far too obsessed with K to massacre her personality.

OP posts:
aspiringyetshite · 11/07/2024 23:07

the key word is 'for a teen'.

Would you consider this suitable for someone between the ages of 12-16? Why or why not?

I really don't want to see comments such as 'no, my 8 year old is far too immature' Grin

OP posts:
onesweetdaisy · 11/07/2024 23:10

Depends - is it gory?

DanielGault · 11/07/2024 23:10

I think it would be too boring/convoluted for a teen. But you know them better.

aspiringyetshite · 11/07/2024 23:11

onesweetdaisy · 11/07/2024 23:10

Depends - is it gory?

No, no gore.

Bleeding/someone losing a leg when they stepped on a mine happen, but they aren't gory in any way.

OP posts:
aspiringyetshite · 11/07/2024 23:13

DanielGault · 11/07/2024 23:10

I think it would be too boring/convoluted for a teen. But you know them better.

This was the exact sort of thing I wanted as a kid - a badass woman who no man dared tell to return to the kitchen Grin

I do get your point however - and a lot of the market is teenage romances with, erm, questionable content at best.

OP posts:
wherearewenowmummy · 11/07/2024 23:14

Doesn't seem to be worse then the spy/thriller books.

If DD/DS wanted to I'd probs let them.

CAnnMac · 11/07/2024 23:16

It depends on how it’s written but the plot sounds very complicated/ convoluted for teenagers. Plus the protagonist in teen stories is usually in the same age group. It’s very unusual to have an adult main character in a teen novel. They probably won’t relate.

BoLlOcKs12345 · 11/07/2024 23:16

Is it aimed at girls?

aspiringyetshite · 11/07/2024 23:19

CAnnMac · 11/07/2024 23:16

It depends on how it’s written but the plot sounds very complicated/ convoluted for teenagers. Plus the protagonist in teen stories is usually in the same age group. It’s very unusual to have an adult main character in a teen novel. They probably won’t relate.

I was worrying about this - hopefully her being 19 at the start and 21 at the end won't be too far off...

It is a VERY complicated plot.

And she's as morally grey as I could write, using people and the camp as a means to an end, her only goal being avenging I, until the attacks are found out about at least, so I don't know if the lack of heroes could also be something teens won't like.

OP posts:
CAnnMac · 11/07/2024 23:20

What exactly makes it a book for teenagers?

aspiringyetshite · 11/07/2024 23:21

BoLlOcKs12345 · 11/07/2024 23:16

Is it aimed at girls?

It's mainly aimed at teenage girls who want to read about badass women but still want some lesbian representation Grin

It's also written by a woman Grin

OP posts:
aspiringyetshite · 11/07/2024 23:24

CAnnMac · 11/07/2024 23:20

What exactly makes it a book for teenagers?

It revolves around a military boot camp for teenagers - most of who have been sent there to 'shape up' - and the plot line revolves around that camp mainly.

I've also tried to make it as teenager-appealing as possible - I wouldn't read it personally, nor would most of my friends who have read extracts, but most of them and me agree that we would have loved it age 14 Grin

OP posts:
DanielGault · 11/07/2024 23:26

aspiringyetshite · 11/07/2024 23:13

This was the exact sort of thing I wanted as a kid - a badass woman who no man dared tell to return to the kitchen Grin

I do get your point however - and a lot of the market is teenage romances with, erm, questionable content at best.

For a clever kid, this sounds very try hard I think. Just get them normal (well written) books and whatever else they might like. Imo anyway. She sounds very switched on so she's naturally going to find her way. You just need to fund it 😁

aspiringyetshite · 11/07/2024 23:28

DanielGault · 11/07/2024 23:26

For a clever kid, this sounds very try hard I think. Just get them normal (well written) books and whatever else they might like. Imo anyway. She sounds very switched on so she's naturally going to find her way. You just need to fund it 😁

I'm not sure what you mean - I'm writing this book - and K/I/J/A/P are not my children...

OP posts:
aspiringyetshite · 11/07/2024 23:31

aspiringyetshite · 11/07/2024 23:28

I'm not sure what you mean - I'm writing this book - and K/I/J/A/P are not my children...

Are you assuming K or one of the characters are my children?

OP posts:
Marblessolveeverything · 11/07/2024 23:37

The plot is too convoluted and the age of your character will be an issue. 21 to your intended audience is ‘ancient’.

If you are writing violence and anarchy write detail. The audience will want authenticity's.

But the context of the above may alienate your wider audience. Most want some element of relationship they are beyond the age of consent.

At that age I read Stephen King alongside Mills and boon so eclectic readers are there.

Hatfullofwillow · 11/07/2024 23:40

Boys also like badass female characters btw and it sounds like something I'd have enjoyed at that age.

DanielGault · 11/07/2024 23:46

aspiringyetshite · 11/07/2024 23:28

I'm not sure what you mean - I'm writing this book - and K/I/J/A/P are not my children...

Apologies, I thought you were buying for your child! Am a bit distracted. As I said, I think it's a bit convoluted, but it's up to you. We don't know the audience.

Saracen · 11/07/2024 23:52

My kids wouldn't have liked it and nor would I have enjoyed it as a teen, because none of us liked violence. I can see that some teens would like it.

It seems to me that the challenge would lie in the marketing. On the face of it, it might not seem like a YA book. With an older protagonist, teens (and people who are recommending books to teens) might assume the content would be inappropriate or that teens wouldn't have enough life experience to relate.

Some teens would happily engage with it - but they would be the sort of teens who like adult books, not the sort who seek out Young Adult fiction.

I'm not saying that people would dislike the book if they read it. I'm saying I doubt they would pick it up in the first place and give it a chance.

FTPM1980 · 11/07/2024 23:59

I think the two plots of targeting the friends and family are sadistic and psychological torture is unsuitable for young teens. The idea of killing an innocent person to get revenge on someone else is awful, and if your heroine champions that its irresponsible.

LibertyDuck · 12/07/2024 00:04

Sorry, but it sounds crap. I wouldn't buy it for anyone. I'd be very surprised if such a novel was ever even published (traditionally, at least).

TwinklyNight · 12/07/2024 05:29

No, sorry. It sounds violent.

IceCreamWoes · 12/07/2024 06:08

It's not something I would have been interested in at that age nor would the teens I know who, like me, are big readers.

Procrastinates · 12/07/2024 06:14

Honestly no I wouldn't. I lost interest in the idea whilst reading the first post. As others have said it sounds way too overcomplicated and a character of 19-21 is simply too old for most teens to relate to. I'd be very surprised if it was picked up by a publisher.

FusilliGeri · 12/07/2024 06:23

So a powerful facist who killed the prime minister decides to get at a teenager by killing her mate?