Both DH and I work full time. We have 3 children, the eldest is from his previous relationship and is grown up.
Prior to my current role I worked from home and, as such, would pick up most of the domestic duties like, walking dog, all school drop offs and pick ups, cooking, washing, packing children’s bags and cleaning.
My husband does do all of the bill payments, mows lawns and sorts insurance stuff etc.
Recently we have changed jobs. I now work a 40 hour week in the office and he works from home. His company van has only 2 seats. Therefore all pick up and drop offs fall on me and the same domestic duties as before.
Am I being unreasonable to be grumpy and resentful towards him for this? I literally feel completely worn down and burnt out but I am not sure if I’m just being a martyr or whether there is an imbalance here.
To top it off, today our daughter was sent home from school with a rash and my husband was angry at me for not standing up to them and insisting she stays at nursery (she was not poorly otherwise). Earlier this evening we had a huge fight as, I have tomorrow off, and I suggested he takes kids to school to give me a break. He screamed at me and told me it was my problem as, ‘I was trying to shirk difficult conversations with nursery staff about our daughter going in’. As an aside, I realise some mums out there will point out I have a day off but I really feel I could do with a few hours to myself as I rarely have this.
He stormed out of house and sent me this msg ‘Nursery is your problem being soft with them, not our daughter’.
Am I being unreasonable? I have recently come off my medication for anxiety and he has pointed out that I am being unbearable. So I am looking for level-headed support here to advise me if, in actual fact, I am being combative with him and actually need to get some perspective. Alternatively is there some merit in my current sentiment.