To think that this isn't fair (school situation)

[whyisswangnotaword]

To cut a long story short, my child's school is holding a whole school trip to a beach to mark the end of the year.
It's been highly encouraged for all students to attend, albeit a little too encouraged and has come across to many as very pushy, which has been off putting.
We are not attending, due to my child's horrific travel sickness. I was called and asked if we were attending after already saying we are not - and then was further questioned as to why we are not going. That's not the point though -

We have today been told that any children not attending will be set online work to complete for the day that the school is closed for the trip.
I will be taking my child out for the day, most probably to the cinema due to bad weather .. because although she is aware of the reasons we are not attending and did not want to go due to travel sickness (it would absolutely NOT be enjoyable for anybody) it's still not nice for her to think of all of her friends out having fun whilst she is stuck at home.

Is it silly of me to think that it's unfair that the school are setting an online work day for the children that aren't attending?
I would agree with it totally if she were missing an educational trip, but it's not that. It's a whole school trips for the children and their parents to have a fun day at the beach.

No. They are an educational establishment. School trips are educational. They are providing education while the school is closed.

Kwells Kids are Hyoscine. They worked well for my daughter.

Cinnarazine, promethazine...there a several that are suitable for children of your DD's age.

The reason she's ok in the middle of the bus is that her brain is having to process less visual information. She's travelling forwards but the visual information is coming sideways in a car, which confuses the brain. The bigger distance helps. Same with ferries, etc.

Once on the boat train to France, the train pulled up parallel to the sea
Sea was rough.
People were swallowing seasick pills - but by then it’s probably too late.

We’d taken Ours the night before ( son aged 7)

It was 24 h travelling on boat and train and zero nausea!

School could make it optional?

Just phone her in sick with 'd&v' and enjoy your day at the cinema. I had to do this for my DC who has a phobia of dogs and didn't want to go on a mandatory trip to a local park popular with dog walkers.

Blimey, I've just seen that your child is in RECEPTION!
YANBU, at all. Who gives reception-aged kids school-work in place of an outing??

Yea it's silly OP because it's still a school day, and it's always been the case that if you can't go on a trip you have to do set work instead. At our school shed have to physically attend as well

I am now 51 and I was taking Kwells in the 1970s and 80s and they did the job then, so I imagine a more advanced product today would be even more effective.

OP I hate the beach, flipping sand gets everywhere and I've spent most of my life in a seaside town but even I wouldn't refuse a small child a trip to the beach. Especially if they don't live there and get to go on a coach with their friends. I agree with the people you call rude I'm afraid, she's going to have a very narrow experience of life if you carry on like this!

The right antisickness meds will help. She also needs to stay sitting up because lying down won’t help. She might have other triggers - stuffy air, needing to wee, needing food or drink or travelling too soon after food and drink. I’m in my 40s and I can’t read or even look at a map in cars or on buses or trains without feeling dizzy and sick. You’ll figure it out eventually. Try not to get so anxious about it because she will pick up on that. Lots of children get travel sick and some take longer to grow out of it than others. She’s very unlikely to be throwing up in the car when she’s 21.

If you take the day off, don't bother with the work.

However - every school trip, there will always be at least one vomiting child. Does she not have fun after she's arrived and her stomach has settled? If not, totally don't make her go.

My ds can last about 4 minutes, and then vomits every few minutes, down to the bile and dry heaving, until the motion stops. Kwells help a little, motion bands don't. We walk almost everywhere (my dp and dd are the same). He had his first school trip this year, school thanked us profusely for warning them what would happen (some parents didn't...). He had a great time. We equipped him with clothes, sick bags, etc. Dp volunteered to supervise and helped him (and another sick girl) on the coach. I'm keen to encourage him, and we'll both take turns with annual leave to volunteer while he needs us. Just my experience.

Schools these days seem to think they are a co parent, forget the work and have a nice day out!

Dear oh dear what a dreadful awful attitude to education.
Kids don’t want to do a lot of things on first hearing about them.
My kids don’t want go to all sorts of historical and cultural places when I first mention them but when we get there they always enjoy, and get something out of it not to mention the fabulous learning opportunities. And that’s before we even get to the fact that doing things we don’t want to is all part of life and a valuable tool to learn and experience.
I am an ex teacher and if I thought a parent has this attitude my opinion of that parent and how they value education would drop extremely low.

Reasons etc aside it is totally normal and expected that children not attending a school trip would be set work to do, either at home or in another classroom / year group at school. That’s totally normal.
She is 5 though, so I can’t imagine they’d really care whether you did it or not.

Schools have a duty to provide activity to their pupils that meets their needs everyday of the academic year. They tried to do this in the form of a trip to the beach, but you refused to let your son participate on very justified medical grounds. They therefore have a duty to provide alternative activity. I guess the beach trip is taking all available staff (if it's a full school trip, probably all staff trained to work with the kids), so they can't provide a short trip or in school fun activities on the same day. The homework is what they have come up with. I don't think for a minute they will care if your son doesn't do it because he has had a fun day with you, but they can't know what you will do. Your son might have to spend the day in your office and need something to entertain him. The point is they can't just say "this day do something medically impossible or nothing".

I expect you have already contacted the school with a long list of the trips you deem suitable for your children for next year , so nothing that will offer them a new experience, nothing that will give them a sense of history, nothing with interesting stories, nothing with priceless treasures for them to look at, nothing with hidden secrets that are not normally shown to the public, oh and nothing that has an additional cost , or involves a long journey.

I imagine the school will be very grateful for your diligent research and will do their best to work out a way to fit in your ideas to support the curriculum and won’t raise a single eyebrow at your reasons for the children missing the trip.

I'm sure others will have said this, but they're setting work because they're not allowed to be seen 'giving the child a day off' - if the child isn't going on the trip, they still need to be seen to providing an education for that child on the day.

I wouldn't bother doing it, just send the child in with a note saying due to illness the child wasn't able to do it.

I am surprised thought they're allowed to tell the child to stay at home, I would have thought they'd have had to make alternative arrangements for the child to attend school for the day. I know in practice though that can be very difficult to arrange if all the teachers are needed to go on the trip to supervise children.

@Soubriquet Christ. Did you ask your children if they would like to go ? You may want them to have a better outlook on life.

I went on a school trip to Winchester cathedral in the 60s when I was around 10. I was fascinated and still remember it.

End of year trips were the best part of school and yes, someone usually vomitted on the coach but they have bags for that then everyone got on with the day. Really sad to limit experiences for travel sickness.

I'm intrigued. Do you know if they've done this before? Two and a half hours on a bus is more than DH and I would tolerate, let alone an entire bus full of five year olds. This is a terrible idea.

DS1's reception trip was 40mins away and they all 'survived' the journey, according to the TA.

Thank you everyone for your replies!
I really appreciate those of you that answered the question with a genuine answer. This makes sense to me now.
Also thank you so much to those who gave me tips for the travel sickness, and that sympathised with how difficult it can be for both parties.

To those of you who have been unkind to me, just because you are behind a screen, or are having a bad day.. it doesn't mean you can be rude and nasty to others..

Nobody has been rude or nasty to you though. Some of us have just expressed a different opinion.

@Soubriquet

My dc's trip to a chapel (kings in Cambridge) let to her wanted to join a choir and now is a professional singer! She was really inspired!

This is a whole school trip. Trips like this are educationsl. They are also about community and friendship. Your child should be taking travel sickness medication so they can attend. The school cannot staff a day of other activities for your child. They are being more than accommodating by posting online learning.

Wow, that’s an incredibly shitty thing to say. My eldest has missed out on trips because disability/sen. I can drive and I dont work but I can’t always go with on trips. Had the exact same situation as @whyisswangnotaword - seaside trip 2.5 hours away. Eldest wasn’t comfortable going, especially knowing they couldn’t leave until the trip was done. School did nothing to convince me that they could meet needs. Was also left with work to do at home. I took my child out then treated them to a new toy instead.

Your post speaks far more of a narrow life experience to be honest. Oh, and cathedrals are boring as fuck to most children outside of MN’s fantasy middle class world.