Police Complaint

[ImpossiblyDoneBy]

Hi,

I'm posting here for traffic as I have no idea what to do.

For context, between November 2022 and April 2024 I was stalked, harassed, assaulted and had my home broken into by my ex. During this time police were not interested in any of these reports and did nothing. In November 2023 I was almost SA by ex when he broke into my home, again police did very little so I obtained and financed my own non mol order against ex in march this year (2024). For some reason once this order was obtained police then decided to get involved and conduct their own investigation into the historic reports, even though there had been no breeches or new events. Ex was arrested and bailed until may which was then dropped with the investigation ongoing.

Police have today called me to say the investigation will now be NFA'd due to new evidence coming to light from restoring ex's old whatsapp of (impossible) communication and initmate meetings between myself and ex between January and April this year. As stated above and in a full blown argument with police that this is impossible. Suspiciously, They stated they were unable to provide me with this evidence they had found as they said they no longer had his phone and had only made notes of this without actually documenting anything. They also confirmed that they were unable to match these messages to data from my phone as its believed they could not retrieve my own WhatsApp history (even though his phone was fully encrypted, password protected and mine was not). Is it possible that when they've restored his device previous messages from whilst we were in a relationship have come through out of sync or something?

Why would I communicate with someone who made my life hell for 2 years especially after the last inicident in their failures to protect i was almost raped? Plus how could I possibly of obtained a non molestation order against ex if there was an alleged full blown active trail of evidence of communication and "intimate meetings" beyond the date of this order, which may I add ex didn't even contest?

None of this makes any sense, is completely implausible and its causing alot of stress. I'm heavily pregnant (not exs) and the police are stating that notification to social services to make them aware of these findings as a safeguarding concern as will the courts to review my non mol. WTF! I really don't know what, if anything I can do about all this? I'm trying to get my messaging history off my old phone for my own evidence though I have got proof that his number has been blocked on my WhatsApp and messages for a significant length of time, just not a trail of message history to go along with this anymore other than screenshots.

No advice but look into the right to review process. You can request your case be reviewed by a more senior officer once it has been filed. I think there is a time limit on this though so don’t leave it too long. I think it’s 3 months but not 100^

@Peanutbutterjelly123 I'm having a look at this now. Would I need to have as much counteracting evidence ready to hand first though to have the request to review even considered?

Hopeful bump incase anyone has some advice 🙏

Have you considered if Women’s Aid can help? I think a case review is the way to go but you would really benefit from having someone in your corner supporting you.

I would complain

It's very easy to do and it will be reviewed by a senior officer

Google police complaints in for the police force area
I would take some time before you go to write down exactly what happened and what your complaint is

Good luck, or go via your MP

You poor thing. Sounds like an absolute shambles from start to finish.

Yeah it has definitely been a shambles over the past 2 years trying to get any form of help. They were even getting complaints from my IDVA at one point over their lack of interest so whilst it's not unexpected that they aren't pursuing the investigation any further, their reasoning for doing so is completely implausible never mind a joke. I just don't understand why they are now making threats to report me to social services and even taking this further to try and get my non mol order revoked when that was financed myself completely independantly without police, which as it stands is my only form of protection. By their own claims they have no factual evidence by retaining copies of these alleged messages or even been able to match them to my own device data.

They've had multiple logs from me of incidences, 147 to be exact over the span of a year and a half, 9 incidences police have actually witnessed themselves of but did nothing about, now messages of intimate communication and interaction appear to be being fabricated in a time period a protection order was approved, not contested by ex and put in place, not to mention he was arrested and bailed after this window too. Its just really baffling and i cant really understand the logic or the reasons behind their added threats to take things further.

I've contacted my IDVA for advice, though not sure what chance of a fight I have against hearsay of a police force in this.

It's also clearly being implied that they won't even be interested about any potential breeches to the non mol from ex now since they are pushing for it to somehow be reviewed, which is concerning because I'm soon going to also have a baby to protect which is information that has had to remain hidden due to the possible jealousy induced reaction this may provoke but yeah its crystal clear police don't care.

It's funny though, considering they are the exact police force circulating in the news at the moment about leaked phone calls showing their treatment of women.

Really sorry for ranting as its probably making me come across as abit unreasonable but I'm just so overwhelmed with what all this means right now for me and my safety.

Goodness me, ImpossiblyDoneBy, what a horror show you've been forced to endure. I don't have much advice, but this seems sound:

RaisedEyebrows11 · Today 15:26

Have you considered if Women’s Aid can help?

Getting a friendly ear with an group experienced in this must be a good thing. They may be able to offer legal advice, or at least recommend a good solicitor.

And you're not ranting, BTW.

OP, that is awful.

Definitely get back in touch with your IDVA.

Request a review of your case.

Consider contacting your local Police and Crime Commissioner.

You could also contact Paladin, the national stalking charity.

Make a subject access request for all the records held by Police pertaining to your personal data electronic, voice recording of calls to the switchboard reporting incidents etc, online reports etc.

Get a tech person to help you get your records off your phone.

I would be concerned that there is a conflict of interest somewhere within the investigation team i.e someone knows him and is covering up evidence as it all sounds very dodgy.

Make a complaint maybe IVDA can help with wording?

Speak to your MP.

Speak to Women's Aid and or a solicitor.

Thank you for all the avenues to chase up, I'll get started on these tomorrow and also reach back out to my own support with the update I've been provided with aswell as my concerns.

@ImpossiblyDoneBy no you don’t need any more evidence, it is essentially you asking someone else to look over everything because you don’t agree with the outcome x