To find this infuriating?

[Haveyouseenmyinsertitemhere]

I don't 'do' cards (birthday, wedding etc). I don't like receiving them and I think they're a waste of money and environmentally poor. I never, ever send any (so it's not like I seem discriminatory).

My mum (fyi, I'm a 40yo adult with 2 kids of own) insists on buying a card on my behalf and either having me sign it or signing it on my behalf! Recently she's done it for my brother's wedding (I gave them a generous cash gift) and my step-sisters birthday (I'd bought her a gift).

Today she tried to get me to sign one for my her husband's birthday (they've only been married 18months, so he's not my step dad - that's not me being mean, I do like the bloke). I just refused and I told her I'd message him to make clear the card 'from' me was not from me.

Would you be annoyed at this? It's not like I forget or I send certain people cards, it's an active choice I've made!

Yes it may seem petty but it's happened 3 times in 3 weeks and I'm getting pissed off.

Just sign the cards. It's not exactly a huge deal.

The cards aren't really for you are they, it's for the person you're giving it to. I love receiving cards, I save them for years and always make sure I write something personal in cards in case recipients feel the same.

As for "waste of money"....I usually buy pretty cards that cost less than a couple of quid from places like Card Factory, supermarkets etc.
If the pictures are nice enough the receiver sometimes puts them in a frame or pinned on a wall.
Very cheap art work really.

I'd be mildly irritated but I wouldn't go to the effort of messaging someone to say the card wasn't from me. That's just petty.

It's the sort of thing my mother would do, but I pick my battles.

I wouldn't message him - what would be the point.

I agree with you about cards though.

I think cards are a generational thing. I can phone my mum, give her a gift etc. but if she doesn’t receive a card it’s like I have committed a heinous crime. Same if I don’t send my older relatives one and it gets “reported” back to her.

My siblings , nieces and nephews, friends however would think I had been abducted by aliens if I sent them a card rather than just what’s app / text them to wish them a happy birthday , congratulations or what ever the occasion is.

Depends how much you want to fight with her over this - ask yourself ( and only you will know) if it’s a “die in the ditch” moment for you or whether it’s a case of her money she’s wasting and if it keeps her happy…….

I can see your point. If you have chosen not to ever send cards for your own reasons, I can understand why you feel that your mum is intruding on that decision and making you feel infuriated. I'm sure that she means well but you will need to ask her to stop

I detest cards. Don’t send them and hate receiving them. I tell my mum every year not to bother sending me birthday and Xmas cards, I remind her that it’s a waste of time and I won’t display them…ever.

but alas…she still does it anyway. I would let your Mum crack on, It makes her happy and in the scheme of things, it’s no biggy. I’m totally on board with the pointlessness of cards though, especially if they are cheap crap ones haha.

My sis doesn’t do cards due to the environmental issue and it makes sense to me so well done OP. I agree with you and I think I’m also going to stop the cards

This would really annoy me too, OP.

Next time she hands you a card to sign, take if from her, tear it up, and tell her you will do that every time in future.

I'm totally with you. I hate the thought of so many trees being cut down just so people can make social gestures which are of no real value. The card is looked at briefly, then gets thrown out. People should respect the way you feel about it and not ask you to participate in their gestures.

Are you going to say I didn't send the card because I don't send cards and someone sent it on my behalf. Which would be OK but really weird, or just I didn't send the card, which is also weird.

My mil buys cards for my husband to sign for random relatives. Addresses and stamps them too. It is very very odd. These are people that never speak to each other, no fall outs just not close.

And the irony is when she received a card it goes straight in the bin. She hates them!

I hear you.... but I'm of your DM's generation and I love receiving cards. I keep them up on my mantelpiece for about 6 weeks after I get them. So I'd say you need to send those cards, and if you don't want to, then at least sign the ones your DM has prepared for you on your behalf.

Honestly, the joy I get at seeing cards coming through the letterbox is 1000x any phone call, text message, WhatsApp, etc.

It's almost certainly a generational thing - and I admit I'm on the wrong side of those generations. But for a little bit of effort on your part your DM will be so happy, so please write/sign/send that card.

Some cards are lovely pieces of artwork though.

I'm with you, but I'd simply refuse to sign it. If she is happy in the delusion leave her to it