to ask Dh to get up in the night with ds now that I'm 36 weeks pg?

[deaconblue]

I've done any night wakings (usually 2 or 3 times a week and only for 10 mins) so far as it seems unfair to ask Dh to get up when he has work the next day. But a) looking after a 2 year old and being pg is harder work than any job I've ever done and b) there's only 4 weeks to go and I'm meant to be getting as much sleep as possible. Is it selfish to ask him to do every night or maybe just ask him to take turns???

Message withdrawn

I think that if the waking are as you say they are, it is really no big deal for an adult to get up for a few minutes every other night or so. Yes, he should help. It's hardly hours and hours is it? He wouldn't complain if he needed to get up to go to the bathroom.

my dh also will get up with the ids in the night regardless of whethet i'm pregnant or not

they are his kids too and surely even if your not at work it' just as important not to be over tired and alert when looking after small children

He hasn't objected, he just never offers. He is doing the marathon at the weekend and needs loads of sleep but I think I'll say something after. At the moment due to my pregnancy snoring he's sleeping in the spare room on the floor above so wouldn't hear ds anyway but we could swap til I have the baby and then he'd hear him.

I used to see to dd while i was pg, we don't normally take turns as dh does alot of driving and works with machinery so would be unfair to expect him to get up when he is at work the next day.

I can remember sitting on the floor of dds room crying (quietly) as i was so tired!

I remember Dh being shocked when my best friend was heavily pg and was sleeping on the floor next to her dd's bed every night to try to get her back off to sleep. Then he thought the husband should be doing it despite working shifts as a police officer. You'd think he would see the similarity and offer wouldn't you?

YANBU

My DP watched me struggle up a ladder with SPD at 36 weeks pg with DS2. He also used tp stand and watch me struggle in from the car with loads of heavy bags of shopping.

I feel your pain

Is worth getting him into the habit of doing ds's night wakings now, since when you have the baby you will want to concentrate on the newborn at night and NOT be dealing with both.

YANBU. I always made a point of being the one to get up with ds1 so dh could sleep as he had to work and most of the time dh didn't wake anyway. Once ds2 came along, dh seemed to reprogramme himself to hear ds1 so he got up for him while I got up with baby. He did tend to sleep in at weekends though, even if I was up at 5 with the boys until I cried all over him and told him i couldn't cope. He is now a lot more helpful.

I'm sure he's just so thankful (in a very silent way) that you haven't yet asked him to do any of the night shift work. Agree, you shouldn't have to ask, but he's trying to hang onto this good thing for as long as he can, perhaps he knows it will all come to an end for him once the db arrives....
Think you should move to spare room and max out your uninterrupted sleep before db arrives.... snore as much as you like there!

No YANBU he should be getting up at least half the time.

My DP is up at 6am weekdays and he is doing more than his fair share right now as I have SPD and it takes me about 5 minutes to actually get out of bed. I also know he will do more night wakings once DD3 is here as I will be BFing her in the night too.

Perhaps you could argue that it's your snoring that is causing the night wakings???

YANBU get the lazy git on the case now.

I am deliberately missing salient points such as you not asking yet and the marathon for dramatic effect as I am bored.