Health Anxiety

[Talkabtit101]

Posting for traffic really.
And I'm not even sure what I expect from this post but just wanted to vent it out really.

I'm a long term sufferer of Health anxiety, centred around my own health, did swap to DD when she was born however something happened to a previous family member which made the anxiety manifest itself back to me.

I'm always poorly, I always feel horrible, whether that be a headache, a belly ache, back ache, sore arm, sore legs, tired, no appetite and dizzy. Theres never a day where nothing feels wrong.

The biggest issue was heart palpitations, after fighting my GP for 16 months I finally got referred to cardiology. There was no abnormalities apart from a Single Superventricular Isolated Ectopy, so they signed me off. I still get them now, but I'm also a long term suffer of costochondritis, which I don't know if they're " PVCS " or a blatant muscle spasm.

I have a loving partner and an amazing DD, but I'm always sad. I'm scared I'll be this way for the rest of my life and I'll eventually end up pushing everyone away with my constant reassurance seeking.

The newest concern is I'm scared of a certain Blood C, I have pain under my left rib whenever I eat/drink or sometimes take a deep breath. Also upon pressing the lower area of my rib cage I can feel something, it might be a rib but I don't know, it feels softer than the other ribs.

I was suffering with feeling tired, and due to always feeling poorly I went down to the GP and they requested blood tests. I had those done at the beginning of the month which all came back fine apart from High White Blood Cells, normal range is 4.5-10.9 and mine were 11.6.

The DR requested a retest for 4 weeks time which I'm due to have again on Wednesday.

Once again now as the day gets closer I'm back in the cycle of googling my symptoms which is bringing me back to Blood C. I had a big cry about it today and I have a pounding headache now, and I've seen how amazing the people of Mumsnet are at hand holding. I don't know what I'm after for really, I just can't cope anymore.

I'm scared of leaving my DD behind and my lovely DH, and something happening to me whilst I'm young. I sometimes can't sleep because of it, sometimes can't eat.

I have toilet issues where I'm constipated for days and then something panics me and then have loose BMs. It's a never ending cycle, sharp stomach pains, cramps back ache.

I just don't know what to do.
Does anyone / did anyone suffer with health anxiety? Does it get better? What helps? I can't keep living like this anymore.

Also I'd like to ask, how much weight loss is normal? i lost 4LBS in 6 weeks without trying and I don't feel like I've being eating less, however did so a bit more walking/activity in the last few weeks.

Pretty much all the health issues you’ve listed here sound like physical symptoms of anxiety. You need to seek treatment for your mental health because there’s almost certainly little, if anything, wrong with you physically.

Do you receive any treatment for your anxiety? It sounds like it’s taking over your life

4lbs in six weeks isn’t even remotely significant. People can easily lose or gain that in a week just from ordinary, harmless water retention.

Why are you weighing yourself anyway?

I requested CBT through my GP who referred me, but unfortunately I never had a face to face appointment only phone conversations, and they told me I wasn't " under intense suicidal risk " and due to waiting lists couldn't pursue with my CBT.

And unfortunately I'm not well off enough to pay for private therapy

You poor thing. I have health anxiety too - I’ve spent the last 4 weeks convinced I’ve got ovarian cancer and am going to die and leave my young children. It’s exhausting.

I’ve actually just started on an SSRI, I’m 3 weeks in and it’s starting to help I think. Would medication be something you’d consider?

I think losing 4lbs in 6 weeks is absolutely normal. My weight fluctuates by a few pounds like that over a few weeks.

What about medication for anxiety?

The GP wouldn't start any medication until I'd tried therapy

> therapy wouldn't continue therapy.

I mentioned medication at my blood test appointment but it was with a nurse and she said I'd need to ask the GP, but then got the results back and that's all that's been on my mind since.

@Newtosertraline

That's the hardest thing. It's imagining my daughter living in a world without her mum, I can't bare the thought and I tear up thinking about it.

There are medications you can take op. Sertraline has changed my life. I started having what I now know to be panic attacks in August 2023. Had an attack at work and came home ill. Huge health anxiety, fear I was going to die, stabbing heart pain, couldn't eat as it made me feel sick (I lost 11lb in 3 weeks, I was managing to eat 3-400 kcal a day), dizzy every time I stood up. Diarrhea.

I was terrified.

Went to the Dr who initially diagnosed labrynthitis. I couldn't take the anti sickness meds he prescribed because I was terrified of the side effects.

Husband gently mentioned that he thought it was my mental health and nothing was wrong with me physically.

Long story short, went back to the Dr who was very empathetic and recommended sertraline. It took me 4 days and some serious bargaining with myself to take the first pill but I'm so glad I did.

You don't have to live this way op.

Clinical Psychologist here. You need to refer yourself to your local Talking Therapies service, which is the lower "layer" of NHS Stepped care mental health provision. Their remit is to treat mild to moderate anxiety and depression using therapies like CBT, rather than the CMHT which deals with severe problems and/or high risk (hence why they triaged you out). In the mean time, you could learn more about the vicious cycles keeping your difficulties going, and practice some helpful techniques, with a CBT-based self help book; such as "Overcoming Health Anxiety" by David Veale & Rob Willson. Good luck to you.

That's not the GP's call OP.

Yep sertraline fab. My symptoms also coincided with being early 40s and it’s so clearly peri menopause.

@Nigellasstickytoffeepudding personal question (and not to hijack thread) but I’ve posted this elsewhere with no response - has the sertraline killed your sex life?

@Slattern77 no, same as it ever was

@Talkabtit101 I’m sorry you feel this way, I can relate to a lot of what you say as I used to be this way too. I can’t recommend therapy enough, a good therapist should be able to get to the root cause of why you are experiencing anxiety in the first place. My health anxiety has improved by about 90%, I don’t think it will ever go away entirely but with therapy, reading/research and meditation it’s significantly better. I find meditation grounds you and forces you to stay in the moment, it won’t cure it on its own but it does help.

Blood C?

Oh, you poor thing. I've had really good quality CBT and it was incredibly helpful. I've also tried an app called Dare when I had a bit of an uptick - I found it helpful although it's more aimed at panic attacks.

Also breathing exercises, meditation and exercise etc.

It is much much better now. I still worry more than most people but that's who I am. It's not poleaxing my whole life which it did before at its worst.

I don't like saying the full name of the illness, I also suffer with OCD. It's a ritualistic thing. But I'm sure most will know what I mean.

I will check out the CBT links posted above and will also chat to my GP about medication. DH used citalopram for a whole years back, has that helped anyone here?

I take citalopram. A small dose but has made a huge difference to me. Would definitely recommend meds and CBT OP.

Also, I don’t know how old your DC is but it’s important to focus on your emotional well being so they don’t pick up on your anxieties and start to worry themselves.

I have tried those apps.

But I find in times where my heart is racing the mediating and focusing on breathing tends to make it worse rather than help.

But you have been tested for cardiac anomalies and told that you're fine.
Just ignore it.

@TheShellBeach

I'm not concerned about the palpitations.

I'm concerned about the tiredness, the pain under my left rib, I have knee pain when walking in my left leg, and I had been told I had high white blood cells. That's my concern at the minute.

What kind of a life is she living with a mum worrying she's going to die all the time?

But your doctor isn't worried.