To think my siblings are taking the piss

[irishchick93]

Hi. Elderly mother lives with me and my family. Sold her house last year and bought a modular home which resides in my garden.

Siblings all got money from sale of the house 10k each and my mother's will is made that anything else will be split by me and my 2 siblings equally.

I didn't take my mother in for money or for anything rather than the fact that she didn't want to live alone and I have 4 small children wasn't finding the time everyday to make the 40mile round journey to visit her . My siblings have jobs and I don't so I was always the one that was around .

We love having her here she pays her own way and I love my kids growing up seeing nana daily.

She lives an independent enough life but doesn't have any friends left and very little family would only talk on the phone to them .

I'm trying to build a picture.
However, my siblings are constantly asking for money or to buy them stuff. House repairs etc. And she gives it. I'm sure they are within their right to ask but I can't help feel annoyed that I wouldn't dare ask and its clear that I need some repairs done. I understand I'm not entitled to anything more than them and I don't want it but can't help be annoyed that I'm the one to do everything and they just land once every 2 months to ask for a hand out. Not invited mum ever to there house or taking mum for the day or anything...and yet they are benefitting from the house sale that by the way, they weren't happy about to begin with

I'm not the type to be bitter but AIBU for this to annoy me?!

It’s your mum’s money to do what she wants with, but I’ll never understand how parents are suckered into supporting grown adults who don’t offer anything back to the parent, and disregard the sibling offering care. I’d be royally pissed off at them burning through your mum’s money when they’ve already had 10k. Family can really be shitty.

YANBU. What a cheek! Grabby adult children never cease to amaze me. But they're always lurking.

Ask your DM if she's feeling under pressure to hand over her money to them? It would be awful if she was being taken advantage of.

So check with her. Mum, are you happy to be helping them out? Have you had financial advice to be sure it's ok?

In that case, if you are sure, would you help me with the windows? It's a bit of a worry and I don't seem to be getting any closer to affording it.

Not an expert, but depending on the amount she is giving away and should she ever need care, this could be seen as deprivation of assets. https://www.ageuk.org.uk/information-advice/care/paying-for-care/paying-for-a-care-home/deprivation-of-assets/
Might be a reason to stop the behaviour!