Nearly 14 year old and fake tan limits

[mardirousse]

So I was one of the wise, confident parents on someone else's thread about their 14 year old, thinking my little one was getting past the obsessed with her looks phase.
Silly me.
She's started wearing fake tan (bought herself with own money: she gets paid 20eur for reffing a match) and I feel a little concerned as I think she's planning on wearing it all the time.
I don't want her getting used to seeing it on herself to the point that she feels she looks bad/pale/sick without it.
I told her she's allowed wear it for special occasions and experiment a little bit beyond that, but no more than once every 2 weeks.
She's sad. Am I being unreasonable to limit fake tan application for a (nearly) 14 year old

I can't think why it's a big deal.
I can think how it could become a battle zone though, and it's not worth it.
Leave her to it. Trying to stop teenagers from following trends and experimenting is like trying to stop the tide coming in.
And I personally think we shouldn't want to. Yes, trying to keep them from putting themselves in dangerous positions is needed. But interfering unduly in the teenage experimental process, when it's not harmful, is, imo, not helpful in their development of self.

Christ. Worst things to get het up about.

My DD’s sheets look like one of those crime scene outlines, but they’ve coloured the middle in brown/orange 😂

My 14 year old wanted fake tan, I helped her to apply it on her legs and arms, she just wanted to experiment. She occasionally uses it on her legs herself, but the novelty seems to have worn off. The way I see it is she’s growing up and if I say no to her naturally wanting to experiment it will make it more desirable anyway…there’s worse things than fake tan to worry about.

Thanks for all your advice.
I really am very happy for her to experiment, and indeed hope she gets lots of practice before she goes to her uncle's wedding in September (she truly needs this practice).
I just don't want her wearing it constantly as she will get used to her skin looking dark and it will become something else she needs to do in order to feel normal.
She is ok with the once every 2 weeks limit now, thank goodness, and doesn't seem sad anymore.

Really need advice , my 12 year old daughter in last few months has slowly spiralled and is out of control. I’ve tried everything that I can think of to try and get her to be happy , I’ve now done a self referral for mental health and spoken to school. She has started hitting me in the face , shouting at me constantly, I know she needs help and doing my best to get her all help I can , I paid for meditation class for her but she wouldn’t go , holistic healing she won’t do , even though in primary school she used too, she is obsessed with the way she looks , fake tans , eyelashes ! Her self esteem is very low, I’m starting to struggle to cope, I’ve agreed to a parenting course via school even though I know I’m doing best just incase I’m missing anything. Any tips on how to save your own sanity whilst your child goes through this ? Feeling scared about the kind of Adult she going to become , she has absolutely zero respect for me , I do not know what I’ve done so wrong but she says daily she hates me, and everything is my fault ! She hates the way she looks , she hates her life and me, I feel so alone and desperate that’s why I’ve posted tonight , any words of wisdom welcome ? Please be kind I’m really struggling at moment.
anything I can do to help my little girl ?

Sorry, edited as realised the thread was a zombie thread