Sister lives other side of the country. She has for about ten years. She's an 8 hour drive away. She typically comes to visit (me, friends and our parents ) 3-4 times a year.
She use to stay with us (2 adults, 4 kids) on her visits for a week or so and share a bed or use air bed in one of my dds rooms. But she and teens started arguing usually about bedtime/lights off. Music on in room, etc. So she started stopping at a friend's house. She won't stop with our parents as they both smoke.
In the last couple years dds are older and are sometimes at boyfriends houses so she will stop in their rooms when they are not there. And stay with friend some of time.
Tbh her visits can be stressful as she's quite a difficult person (snappy) and not use to living with a family and doesn't really enjoy doing family stuff. But obviously we want to see her and for her to spend time with the family .
Last time she came she fell out with friend during visit and stayed in a hotel (we had no room) for last two nights. She's now said she will visit at Xmas and book a hotel.
But other than that she wants us to invite her to stay. Which is tricky as we have four kids in a four bed house. The two adult dd split their time between houses but are normally here 3/4 nights a week. We also find it hard to have her for more than acouple days.
But we never visit her. We have offered couple times in recent years and she declined/cancelled due to work. But two of our kids have Sen so we didn't visit when they were little as they wouldn't have coped. It's only last couple years it's been feasible. But she also can't host and lives in a very expensive tourist area that is ££££ in school hols. So tbh we struggle to afford to go for more than a couple nights and it's a long journey.
Should I feel bad if I don't invite her? I feel like im the reason she can't come.