Being a primary school teacher is INCREDIBLY HARD or AIBU 🫠

[BoneTiredandWired]

Today alone as a teacher I have: Intervened in three fights. Had multiple restorative conversations. Given up both my break and lunchtime to sort out arising issues. Unexpected fire alarm chaos. Taught music and German and had a real laugh with my class. Saw real positive developments of my kids abilities. Shortly later spoken seriously and told off my class.
Dealt with multiple crying children who don't want to leave my class next week. Sang and coordinated our summer concert songs.
Written the last of 28 individually written reports for all my kids.
Tidied up and emptied my entire classroom.
Had a 2 hour after school meeting.
Cried on the way home out of sheer emotional exhaustion and having to be strong carrying the emotions of so many throughout the day.

I ❤️ my kids so so much, but teaching is HARD and so so much more than people think it is

@Lemonsugarpuff I feel this so much too. My sons are now 14 and almost 17 and I've had to miss so much; school plays, sports days etc.
My daughter is starting school in September and I won't even get to take her in on her very first day 😢 Neither will I be able to do any school drop-offs or pick-ups.
I feel like I have to care so much about other people's children whilst not being able to be present for my own.

One thing I’ve noticed is that for all the people that work hard jobs for probably not enough money, teachers complain the most. Why don’t you do something else? Work to live, not live to work. Life is too short to be as desperately unhappy as you clearly are with your job.

I’d be such a terrible teacher, hats off to anyone who does it.

@ttcat37 And who is going to teach your children if we all do that?

This

I love teaching but a lot of the time it definitely doesn't feel as if teaching loves me back.

Teaching is intense in a way that none of my other jobs have ever been, irrespective of how pressurised those jobs have been. I've done jobs which were incredibly stressful, but it was predictable stress over which I had some control and I was generally able to manage my workload in the vicinity of my desk with no expectation of physical exertion or emotional engagement.
In teaching you are required to function on so many levels simultaneously or in rapid succession, often very unpredictably:

being emotionally available to a recently bereft 4-year old
being supportive of a trainee having a tough day
fixing a broken photocopier
lugging sacks of costumes for an end-of-year theatre production across a large site
fielding phonecalls in your break so the receptionist can pop to the loo
making tough judgement calls about safeguarding vulnerable children
having a challenging conversation with an aggressive dad at the playground gate who has come to 'have a word' with a kid who didn't invite his DC to a party
trying to plough through 30 pieces of character descriptions in your lunch hour, marking each in 3 colours and feeling like your eyeballs will turn to raisins after the first 5 as it is so tediously repetitive.

I'd argue that crying with exhaustion at the end of a busy day is not necessarily a sign that teaching isn't for you; it's hard, sure, but on some level, it's this emotional availability which makes you suitable to work with young children. But leadership needs to ensure not too much of the other 'stuff' gets in the way.

being supportive of a trainee having a tough day

fixing a broken photocopier

fielding phonecalls in your break so the receptionist can pop to the loo

^

What would have happened if you didn't do this?

Because at some point, it starts to look like martyrdom

Teachers don't get to see their children in plays, sports days etc. I understand this must be rubbish, but if there are 2 parents maybe the other parent can go to these events?

Teachers get at least some of the holidays off with their children. Other working parents have to throw their wages at someone else to look after their children in school holidays.

I don't know if this is because it's a parenting site that the ratio of moaning teachers is higher but there are so many other professions that have it as tough or tougher and you don't hear them moaning to the same degree.

Yes teachers are hopefully appreciated and do work hard but ffs it's not like they are nurses working 12 hour shifts, including night shifts, including weekends, including being asked to come in when short staffed on their day off, being responsible for peoples lives, having no time for breaks or to eat but still expected to meet government targets, see entitled rude people who then say 'I pay your wages' (when they certainly do not). A nurses salary doesn't reflect their level of responsibility. A NQT wage is pretty good in comparison.

I'm not a nurse but married to one and the above is just one example of a job where it's definitely harder than teaching and as teachers would say 'if they all left who would make you better again'?

The are a lot of jobs out there harder and with crappier working conditions than teaching.

Are you for real? You have to do all those things, it's part of the job. if you don't support that trainee, their performance will drop, the quality of teaching (in your class) will suffer. As class teacher you are responsible for their progress. Performance related pay, anyone?

Photocopier jammed = no resources for that lesson which is a problem. Do you solve that problem.

I haven't been asked to answer the phone during my lunch break but there is a huge list of admin tasks recognised by unions that teachers shouldn't be doing to minimise workload but where is the money to pay other adults to do them? https://www.nasuwt.org.uk/advice/conditions-of-service/administrative-and-clerical-tasks/administrative-and-clerical-tasks-england.html

My teaching assistant is amazing but works 8.30-12pm. With the children (who need her) ad us iften pulled out to cover other classes. I'm at school 7am-5pm so I do all the other stuff.

Teachers make decisions every 3 seconds. There is a huge amount of mental energy expended over a long working day, plus some extra work on weekends. It's physically demanding. Plus the emotional energy required. That's why it's harder than being a cleaner.

I love it and I'm in the right school but it's tiresome when people say it's easy.

Yes teachers are hopefully appreciated and do work hard but ffs it's not like they are nurses working 12 hour shifts, including night shifts, including weekends, including being asked to come in when short staffed on their day off, being responsible for peoples lives, having no time for breaks or to eat but still expected to meet government targets, see entitled rude people who then say 'I pay your wages' (when they certainly do not). A nurses salary doesn't reflect their level of responsibility. A NQT wage is pretty good in comparison.

Sorry I'm not good at quoting @CheshireDing but a lot of what you describe IS similar to teaching. Long working days with little or no break, yes. Extra work at weekends and evenings, yes. Running weekend activities, after school clubs, parents evenings, planning trips. The responsibility for a class of young children's emotional health as well as their academic progress is huge. Safeguarding. No time for breaks or to eat but still expected to meet government targets- this is literally my day. Many parents are entitled and rude, others are not, luckily. Teacher pay does not reflect workload and a TLR for leading a core subject bringing a huge amount of extra workload and accountability on top for a measly £60 a month extra after tax is hardly worth it.

It is a hugely rewarding job and never boring. My colleagues are brilliant and I love the children.
But it should be OK to say, 'this is hard'.

Its a tough job, that's for sure but the amount of leave entitlement is staggering! Is is 13 weeks? Even if they worked for 3
Of those weeks doing research/ planning etc thats still 10 weeks nearly double the statutory amount. Very few Jobs have that amount of off time. My husband had 7 days last year and his job is full on (self employed)

Probably because you train to actually teach but end up being responsible for pastoral care for a huge portion of your day. The teaching; planning, assessment etc is full on but gets taken over by the emotional and practical needs of students every day. In a secondary school you see up to around 180 kids a day and many need support that is not academic. By the time you’ve reported pastoral issues and contacted home, and perhaps also tried dealing with it yourself, you have given so much over and above the actual teaching role. Add in reports, parents evening, CPD, moderation, cover, standardisation, lesson observations, curriculum planning etc, it can be thoroughly overwhelming. A decent pastoral system and strong management will make all the difference but for many, especially in a small school, this just isn’t robust enough.
It is totally relentless and I speak as someone who has also worked outside of teaching, in a tough job with very vulnerable people. In that job, I could at least get a break during the day, get paid overtime, book leave in term time and deal only with clients, not parents, social workers etc on top of my workload. Of course there are other very hard jobs but it is a very particular kind of stress and pressure that it difficult to comprehend unless you have taught or have a relationship with a teacher. I’ve been doing it for over 3 decades and the role has only grown; expectations are huge, especially from parents. Add in utterly inadequate support from CAMHS, social services (another incredibly hard job), Local Authorities etc and you se show schools have to try and fill the gap. Years ago the LA would have subject officers to support, a welfare team etc and that has all gone. Despite this, I have brilliant days and some wonderful experiences with young people and like most, this is why we stay. Expectations about the job need to change; training needs to change and we need to stop peddling the idea that state school teaching is like those cheesy adverts where a teacher leaves the school when his class are going home; all fresh faced and optimistic!

I work as a full time NHS junior doctor. I find it very hard. Physically and emotionally. But I don’t complain about it online (though have done now here of course). Teachers do seem quite fragile and seem to cry a lot. My amazing nurse colleagues go through so much shit and stress and make life or death decisions but I don’t see them crying or talking about crying as much as teachers do. It’s strange.

Teaching however is definitely a difficult job. The government needs to stop messing around with public services.

How childish to repeat the word ‘mate’. You sound like the kids you spend time with. Maybe time to get out of teaching?!

Lots of people miss their kids’ events due an inflexible workplace. Again, why do teachers think they are special in this regard? Is it because they are facilitating other kids’ sports days so they think it’s worse for them as teacher parents? The end result is the same: missing sports day due to work. It’s shit but no worse than for any other workers.

Yes 1 in 5 of them do

@HeavingSuitcase I think it's because many people think teaching is a really family friendly job but actually it isn't In some ways. Perhaps in the past it was but not now

I don’t understand the sense of entitlement that emanates predominantly from this profession.

You have to sing songs and deal with crying children because you are a primary school teacher.

I have to produce forward forecasts and worry about corporate manslaughter charges because I’m a solicitor in the landed estates team, it’s part of the job my partnership employed me to do.

There are tens of thousands of people on MN who work in pressured, demanding jobs yet it is this sector who always leads on the complaints front.

I think this sums it up nicely

I love teaching and recognise that some days are difficult and some days are hard, like any job.

But two things I think are quite uniquely difficult are -

Being mistreated by parents. Not many jobs where the customer/patient/whatever can just pitch up at your door without an appointment, be as rude as they like without repercussions and then do that again twice a day every day for the rest of the academic year.

Having to 'perform' at all times. An upbeat, happy attitude in front of 30 children, always patient, always helpful, answering zillions of questions even if you feel ill or have something hard going on at home. You can't hide at your desk, nip to the loo for a cry or keep your head down in the way you can at lots of other jobs. Just the same 30 little people with eyes on you, all day.

If I hadn’t of secured another position I was resigning at the end of this term. congratulations on getting out of the job you hate. It sounds awful. Best if luck in the new position

I genuinely don’t think it sounds that bad! I would hope you don’t carry the emotions for an entire class - that would not be a good idea

the teachers at our local school (primary) are all away home by 1600

I tried to retrain as a primary teacher but it was impossible to fit around childcare and there are no jobs for qualified primary teachers where I live

now, secondary teaching - that sounds a tougher gig to be fair

I could not be a teacher.
Well, I could not be a good teacher!

I don't have the patience for one thing but mainly i don't have the very important skill needed and that is the ability to give information in a way the children can understand and the ability to give the same information in a dozen or more different ways until all the children understand.

It's not about standing there and repeating facts. Anyone can do that! You've got to be able to find different ways to explain the same thing to different children and ensure you do it in a way that sticks and you've got to remember that while you know these things and they are simple to you, you're trying to give brand new information to a group of people.

I can't even give directions clearly! I get frustrated so easily when trying to describe something and the person I'm giving the information to doesn't instantly know exactly what I mean.

Is teaching the hardest job in the world? No, of course not. But it doesn't have to be that for it to be recognised that it is a hard job and an extremely important job and requires a particular skill set that a lot of people just don't have.

You’re investing too much of yourself in your job. If you died tonight they’d have you replaced in a week. Do not sort out anything during lunchtimes. Leave the premises if necessary. 28 individual reports? Copy and paste? Honestly you’re not paid enough to care this much!

.If you died tonight they’d have you replaced in a week.

I disagree. There is a shortage of teachers. Even supply.