Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

SAHM with a one year old - how many toddler groups?

47 replies

Whalesnailtwo · 18/06/2024 16:48

If you’re a SAHM with a toddler, how many toddler groups do you go to a week?

AIBU to not go to many…Im not particularly sociable an like my own company but don’t want DC to miss out?

OP posts:
Chocolateorange22 · 18/06/2024 18:29

DD probably twice a week, first an organised class and then the other ad hoc if she was well etc

DS didn't bother, he started nursery just before 2 for three days a week. He's now 3 and in pre school 4 days a week. On our day off together we usually just chill and play it by ear.

I found DD was much more interested in exploring than what was happening in the class. Then with DS he'd just sit and hold my hand and not bother doing anything so was just wasting my money really.

Both seem fine around other children and are advanced in their ages to speech and social interactions so I'm not worried I've scarred them by not doing anything.

ChampagneLassie · 18/06/2024 18:31

I went to as many as I could, I found it the easiest way to entertain my LO. So every weekday morning. There is research which shows the children develop better with interaction with other children. I liked socialising with others at groups, but I don’t think you need to, just keep yourself to yourself and focus on your child as you like.

Decafflatteplease · 18/06/2024 18:34

I miss those days 😞

We would do an activity most weekday mornings, either a group eg a toddler group in a church hall or an activity on our own like swimming or the park.

With my younger children they got taken on school runs for the older ones too.

I loved the routine of toddlers, our for an activity in the morning, home for lunch and nap, then afternoons playing. Wish I could do it again 😔

Upinthenightagain · 18/06/2024 18:38

I went to three a week with dd. I wasn’t a sahm but worked evenings so around in the day and she didn’t go to nursery. Now she’s at nursery three days we just do two

JustMarriedBecca · 18/06/2024 18:42

Thing is, if you do a swimming group your baby isn't interacting.

I did something every day. Library twice a week for singing and stories and then a church playgroup. Swimming one day. As they got older we added in another church playgroup and tumble tots.

We also hung out at Waitrose having a free coffee A LOT.

Singleandproud · 18/06/2024 18:50

When DD was little we did 10 a week, one in the morning and one in the afternoon. It was when Sure start was a thing and we had 4 easy to reach centres and everything was free.

But she was an only, and I had nothing else on nor a partner so my day was my own.

What I did find was that those same children turned up everywhere, baby ballet at 3, bushcraft at 6, swimming lessons at 8, paddle boarding lessons at 9 etc. Her two best friends now - one has been with her from mummy and me swimming, through nursery, primary and into secondary and her other was a little girl that was always on the periphery and went to a different Primary but was always at groups and events we went to and they became firm friends at secondary. They were looking through photos at these groups and events and they were in the background of each others photos which was sweet. Generally families that 'do' things continue to be the doers at all ages.

MonkeyTennis34 · 18/06/2024 18:53

Decafflatteplease · 18/06/2024 18:34

I miss those days 😞

We would do an activity most weekday mornings, either a group eg a toddler group in a church hall or an activity on our own like swimming or the park.

With my younger children they got taken on school runs for the older ones too.

I loved the routine of toddlers, our for an activity in the morning, home for lunch and nap, then afternoons playing. Wish I could do it again 😔

😢
I miss those days so much that it sometimes hurts!
DC are now teens......

NuffSaidSam · 18/06/2024 18:59

Children need socialisation, but this doesn't have to come from playgroups.

Ideally you want them to be seeing all different types of people (so not the 10 babies in a room socialisation that nursery offers).

I think across an entire week a few hours spent in the company of other small children is probably a good thing. Could be playgroup, or at the children's library, at a class, the playground, with family/friends etc. Not making the effort to find any interaction with other kids is probably a bit rubbish.

DiscoBeat · 18/06/2024 19:03

It was a while ago now but we used to do music classes, baby gymnastics and a couple of toddler sessions. I don't know if there are as many now since COVID though.

Londonrach1 · 18/06/2024 19:06

5.... But please note this for me...dd be happy just at home...but happy mum happy child...I worked on a routine...10am baby group...finish 12.pm back home lunch sleep 1-3. Play at home or walk or friend pop over... husband back 6-7...it's just worked for me. There's no right or wrong.

Londonrach1 · 18/06/2024 19:09

MonkeyTennis34 · 18/06/2024 18:53

😢
I miss those days so much that it sometimes hurts!
DC are now teens......

Dd at school and yes it's primary but I miss it too...can I borrow a baby or toddler...

Growlybear83 · 18/06/2024 19:11

I took my daughter to one group when she was a toddler and that was fine for her. She had me to talk to, play with, and interact with all day and every day, and my mum was round for one or two days each week as well.

Londonrach1 · 18/06/2024 19:12

JustMarriedBecca · 18/06/2024 18:42

Thing is, if you do a swimming group your baby isn't interacting.

I did something every day. Library twice a week for singing and stories and then a church playgroup. Swimming one day. As they got older we added in another church playgroup and tumble tots.

We also hung out at Waitrose having a free coffee A LOT.

Agree re swimming...I think it more for mum. Tbh baby sensory was for me and amazing photos...dd didn't need it...I needed it. Later I found better groups. The church groups and the library is better. Never pay for a group more than a £1 or 2 I recommend...you find more relaxed parents...

maryberryslayers · 18/06/2024 19:18

One per day unless we were seeing friends with similarly aged children. I think it's important to get out every day.

Now she goes to preschool 3 days per week we do 2 activities per day on days she's home with me.

Personally I'd join some groups and make some friends with the same aged child as DC2.

PurpleChrayn · 18/06/2024 19:21

I go to a regular baby group with my 17-month-old, and sometimes an additional one if his nap times align.

My first child was a COVID baby so we didn't go to any. She's quite reserved and less sociable than her brother, which could be just her personality, or could be due to her lack of interactions with other babies.

Panda34 · 18/06/2024 19:31

We got to 2 or 3, and also meet up with friends once or twice that have similar aged toddlers

ShwingShwingShwing · 18/06/2024 19:36

I did none - tried it and hated them. Had a lot of postnatal anxiety and just compared myself to other mums all the time.

met up with friends with children

we still got out and about and did a lot of walking etc… National trust membership was the best investment!

mightydolphin · 18/06/2024 19:38

At 1, I was taking my DS to weekly swimming lessons, library singing sessions, a playgroup, meeting at least x2 mum friends with similar aged children for one-to-one meets and took up random classes like messy play and as well as softplay.

Neurodiversitydoctor · 18/06/2024 19:40

I worked pt did swimming one day then met friends for lunch, playgroup the other day then park/chill in the afternoon. We livedin a variety of small flats though and DS was very active....

Goldbar · 18/06/2024 19:59

Second/subsequent children are different to the first. They already have socialisation built into their day in terms of dropping off/picking up the older child from school. And in my DC2's case, we visit the playground 3-4 times a week on the way back from school for a play with DC1's friends.

For the first child, if you don't have something planned, there often isn't a firm reason to get out of the house so the days can seem long. For me, the time I have between dropping off and picking up DC1 doesn't feel very long. On my non-working days, there's barely time to do an activity, get home, have lunch, have a nap, play for a bit, do some chores and then get out on time to pick DC1 up.

I'm off work for a bit at the moment and DC2 and I currently do three groups a week (church playgroup, swimming and library rhyme time). The other two days we either stay home and mess around or go for a walk/meet a friend for coffee. When I'm back at work, we'll probably do an activity on each of my non-working days. But DC2 enjoys the activities... the little face lights up when we arrive at them. I think DC2 would quite have liked to have been the first child and had the whole shebang - baby sensory, music, baby gym, messy play, hartbeeps and all that. They have that sort of personality. But tough luck... the energy and money have to split two ways now so we mostly do cheap/free activities and not so many of them😂!

Sunshine9218 · 27/07/2024 22:11

I work 2 days a week (sometimes uni 1 day too) and only like having 1 weekday without anything. I go more for me though haha, lo is fine just hanging out anywhere.

Sunshine9218 · 27/07/2024 22:14

ThunderQween · 18/06/2024 16:49

If you've chosen not to do nursery then you must do play dates or play groups. Something. Your baby needs to interact to learn.

You don't have to go to specific stuff. Taking your child to the playpark, relatives or shop is still social interaction.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page