To not allow DP to use my mat?

[BestestBrownies]

DP wants to use my lovely new pilates mat (thick, spongy one), as a mattress when he goes camping at a festival this weekend.

He has form for taking without asking borrowing my belongings and/or lending them out to others without first seeking my permission, so my annoyance may be coloured by his past behaviours.

YANBU Your lovely new mat will absorb all the gross camping/unwashed body smells and will never be properly clean and useable for pilates ever again.

YABU It's no big deal and the mat can just be cleaned afterwards.

Nope. You're going to be needing it, aren't you? I had yoga mats down when we first had Ddog because she didn't like our hard floors. It gave me the rage when DH walked on them in his outdoor shoes. They don't get it
I bought a fantastic camping mattress (self-inflating) on Amazon recently. I think it was £24. Much more comfortable than a mat not designed for that purpose.

Or you could buy him one if they are so cheap.
Doing things for someone you care about is nice. You don't sound like you like him much.

Maybe she would have if he’d been a bit nicer about her asking for it back? Mansplaining and stropping doesn’t exactly inspire warm fuzzy feels in people, generally speaking.

Or lay down and let him crush you. Be the mat he needs.

FFS why would she buy him one when he took hers without asking and he KNOWS she hates when he does that? Do you give your dog treats when he craps on the floor?

Or you could buy him one if they are so cheap.Doing things for someone you care about is nice. You don't sound like you like him much. 🤣🤣🤣

Oh come on now.

Of course I like him. He has many redeeming qualities. This is just one of his more annoying habits, and it's not the first time, which is why I am standing firm.

Thanks for the laugh though 👍

Like when a partner hasnt got the basic respect to ask to borrow something and just take it? Doesn't sound like he likes her much.

The irony.

Oh God, don't get me started on him wearing outdoor shoes indoors. That would be a whole other thread...

Oh hi, you again.

I suspect the reason he didn't buy one is because it was just easier to take, without asking, what was on hand. Should the OP be responsible for buying items he needs just to protect her own from being taken without asking.

FFS he booked the festival, it's his job to organise the equipment he needs.

Or he could just buy himself one instead of taking what's not his?

Why is it easy for OP to buy but not him, who needs it?

@poolemoney
'PLEASE hide your mat where he definitely can't find it.'

Put it behind the ironing board.

If it’s the IOW Festival he can get one there, shops are full of festival shite! Your mat will definitely get wrecked.

Ide be telling not to bother coming back op

Leave it at work/lock it in the back of your car.

@BestestBrownies men are notorious for bring home someone else's shit instead their own expensive bits!! my hubby plays sports and took an expensive jasper conran towel for his shower but he brought back a crappy ikea towel!!

Is anyone else thinking, who takes a mat camping these days anyway? Doesn’t everyone take inflatable mattresses?

so he paid for everything they owned. Ergo, all belongings are shared, and no permission needs to be sought by either party to use them.

Nope!

Out of curiosity-did he buy you the mat?

😂In my house DH would find it no problem - he does all the ironing here 😂😂

He’s a man, right? I think you have your answer!

🤣

Oh, feel free to "womansplain" to this daft man that he can try to say anything he wants, but the answer is no. It will NOT come back pristine and will smell like male sweat/BO and be filthy since he will not care for it. Then explain how "purchasing" works and maybe, just maybe, he will be grown-assed enough to buy his own mat/inflatable mattress.

Bollocks. If she didn’t like him, he’d be out on his padless arse.

I think it’s not so much the using of the mat but the taking without asking that I’d have a problem with. Like oh that’s someone else’s used for a different purpose and they sometimes have to put their head/face on it but I want it.
But my cat has clawed my lovely thick Pilates mat and I feel a bit embarrassed whenever I go to class (even though I doubt anyone cares) so I wouldn’t want someone stomping on/denting/tearing up my mat with zips etc.

It's a red flag to take something belonging to another without asking.
It shows a fundamental disrespect for others.
It is taught to young children for a reason.
Be wary OP.

They’ve got Pilates mats and yoga mats in Aldi this week btw. The Pilates mats are pretty chunky though. I couldn’t be arsed hauling that from the car.