To move house given our situation?

[CableCar]

DH and I have 2 children - one of whom is autistic, attends mainstream school, just struggles a lot socially. Autistic DS doesn't have many friends - just a best friend.

We have no family support and life is hard at times. We just get on with it, but crave living near the coast as we always feel so relaxed when we visit the sea. DH work is London centric but he does wfh a lot of the time. He grew up in Cornwall and really misses it.

Aibu to move back to Cornwall, before the children start secondary and just start afresh, even though we don't have any problem with where we live atm?

Pros
We've always wanted to live by the sea and our autistic DS loves the freedom of the beach
Could afford bigger house
Our catchment secondary is rubbish so moving would allow us to choose a catchment area in good time for DS starting secondary

Cons
Autistic DS may struggle with the move and you aren't guaranteed that DS will like the new schools
We have brilliant neighbours atm - all so lovely - What if we don't have community where we move to?
I like our current house despite it being small
Current school is so supportive of autistic DS... What if a new school doesn't have as good SEN support?
It's further from DH work and he'd have to travel to London fortnightly
One of our children receives routine hospital treatment in London for medical issues since birth, so we'd have to travel to London for this (1 or 2 times a year)

YANBU - go for it, the kids are still young and it'll be harder to move once they're older - DS will adapt and you'll make friends in time. They say people regret the things they don't try.

YABU - the grass isn't greener and there is no real reason to move. Stay put and enjoy what you have!

I would think carefully. We live sc near the sea.love it but its quite dead in winter and very cold .Good schools are like gold dust! What about a caravan by the sea.my parents had one in the 70s.loved the feeling of escaping for weekends away .we lived in London and escaped to Dover!9

From what I have heard of the very overstretched social and other services in Cornwall, I would not move there in your circumstances.

I live in Cornwall and know a few people who work at Newquay airport. Apparently there are several people who commute to London weekly (fly up on Monday, come home on Friday), so if you're aiming for fairly central that is fairly easy.

I don't know much about SEN support, but I do know that quality varies wildly by school, so I would join some local FB groups and ask for opinions.

Cornwall is just so so far from London. What about somewhere in Kent by the sea? That would make journeys for work or medical appointments way shorter

Thank you! I've said that to DH, although we can't really afford that ATM - we'd have to remortgage. If we ever came into some extra money I'd definitely want to buy a holiday home though (on a holiday park site as opposed to just a second home as I wouldn't personally want to take away from locals)! Perhaps that's the key, in time!

I wouldn't go so far. There's plenty of coastal places closer and with better facilities (heath and education) and connections to meet your needs. There's often threads on here about the shortage of housing down there and the (sometime justifiable) dislike for 'Londoners' moving in, even if DH was originally from there. You're also creating a situation where your DC will likely have to move a long way from you in future. The secondary years go so fast, much faster than primary ime. I wouldn't rock the boat if you're happy where you are and have good neighbours and a solid set up for your DCs' needs.

Very true about the children probably moving away again... It was the lack of jobs that made my husbands family move away in the first place😔

I feel like this post has definitely shown me that I am probably just thinking the grass is greener!! 🙈We do have a lot to be thankful for where we currently are.

I think where you are now sounds perfect,