I need to make peace or wipe some things from my memory

[newstart2420]

Something horrific happened when I was 8, I am now in my 40’s. A few other things happened too. I have had CBT, talking therapy, hypnotherapy and life coaching but nothing has worked. I must have been in therapy for nearly 30 years! DH often says I must have seen every therapist in England by now. I don’t have any money to waste now so was wondering if anyone could help me and point me in the right direction. I really don’t want to waste more years I. Am willing to try something if anyone has had success. I’ve looked into EDMR but all the places I’m looking at (in London) give me a sense of being ripped off. I can’t get in NHS I’ve asked.

EMDR does really work. Why do you feel you might be ripped off? Here in Norfolk it's about £60 a session

To be honest, I'm not hugely surprised that the things you have tried haven't worked so that's positive. It doesn't mean nothing will, but you need something very good at targeting trauma really. Life coaching and hypnotherapy are likely not to help here. CBT in some ways too although some will disagree...

If you have PTSD, then CBT doesn't work. You need EMDR. Do you work? Are you able to access anything through them? (My work offer stuff like this).

Like you, i found cbt and talking therapies and life coaching useless for this sort of thing. Hypnotherapy can change how you remember it, which can help.

I’ve recently started integratedfamily system therapy or ‘parts therapy’ . Which I’m finding surprisingly very effective, after nothing else has worked.

havening and EMDR you can do it yourself up to a point.

IFS as the PP mentioned, or other trauma focused therapy such as compassionate inquiry.

I just read on some websites it may take between 20-30 sessions. I don’t have money for that. Yes I found prices ranging from £60-95 so price wise seems reasonable.

do I look for certain accreditation?

Thank you all. Is there links for self administered therapy I can try?

Everybody is different but I was referred by the GP for a 12 week course of EMDR for a childhood trauma I experienced at 10 years old after everything else failed, it took 8 weeks to work - I went on week 9 and we agreed I had healed so I was signed off. That was 7 years ago now and I'm still trauma free - I even share my experience now to help others and it doesn't hurt me to talk about.
During the 8 weeks I had horrific nightmares, sleep paralysis and I broke after each of the sessions until week 6 - it's not an easy process but for me it was worth it xx

Ready to be ripped to shreds but I’ve done EMDR on my own from a YouTube demonstration and it really helped – at least for one-off traumatic incidents.

That’s so useful to know. Could you please send me the link? Feel free to pm me if you don’t feel comfortable sharing on here x

Similar to you…After years of talking therapy/CBT, which only seemed to re-traumatise me/keep the memories at the forefront of my mind - or simply not help at all- I didn’t have much hope of EMDR helping- and at the time I didn’t think it did, but after a few sessions and employing what I’d learnt when the memories etc came, it did seem to be a subtly magic fix and in quite a short space of time too.
I still think about my bad experiences but they don’t have the power they once did and are just part of what happened in my life rather than defining it.
Hope you find something that helps. Sorry you’re still carrying this with you

I found EMDR transformative.

Have your therapists been trauma informed? It does take ages. I’ve found the trauma doesn’t go but your ‘window of tolerance’ widens

It was this one, I watched a couple of times and then prepared questions relevant to my memory before starting. Good luck getting some relief ❤️

20-30 sessions sounds excessive.

I personally wouldn't do it myself but it's up to you.

Yes they need to be accredited.

Trauma focused therapy could help. The Counselling Directory has lists of types and location for UK. Maybe say from the get go what it is you need help with, I found person centred/Integrated therapy really helped. Like you I've had loads in the past that didn't help. I think it helps to realise you are ready to let this go. You can get past these things and live happily.

Yes I agree with above comment. It is truly possible to live an even better life with past trauma and realising this really helps. It's not a prison sentence. Maybe look into post traumatic growth