Ex wants to claim child benefit

[Helloyou111]

Hi , I’m unsure what to do . I have three daughers with my ex ( ranging from 4-12) and a baby (who I haven’t nothing to do with her father so don’t get money off him ) Ex has just said that because I have 4 children I can only technically claim for 2 of them (which is correct ) so he wants to put two of the girls on his claim ( he’s hoping to get money towards his rent etc . Also he will get child benefit for them (I don’t think he realises that the 2 child cap doesn’t apply here ) and anyway We have 3 children together not 4 as one isn’t his . I can see his point BUT he earns over 45k a year , has tons of help with childcare if needed ( me included ) and has a very good career ( which I never had as I spend 10 years looking after the kids for him to get it and sacrificed my option of having one hence I only earn 400 a month and heavily rely on benefits to get by . if he does this I’ll also have to pay bedroom tax as “my two on my claim are expected to share “ even though I have the kids half the time . also I’m limited to work as I have zero family here or help , I also help him by working around his working patterns . Ive worked out I’ll lose around £250 a month and after all my bills etc I have £50 left for doing things now as it is , clothes , birthdays , emergencies like today I had to get a new washing machine etc . I basically won’t be able to afford to live . I don’t get child maintanance. We both buy clothes for the kids , split school trips etc but what can I say 😭😭

It is fraud to misrepresent information such as primary residency when claiming benefits. To succeed the children would have to officially move house, as they are currently resident at Mum’s but shared equally with Dad.

I could very well be wrong, but I'm sure you can only claim other benefits such as universal credits and help towards childcare etc if you are the parent in receipt of the child benefit?

There isn’t always a primary residence if you have 50/50 and a child arrangement order that states lives with both.

He can simply claim it, he can apply and child benefits decide who gets the money. I think in cases of true 50/50 they can even decide because neither parent has the children more neither are entitled to claim.

This is not strictly true for CB as you can claim it if you pay towards the childrens care an amount thats equal to the CB amount. You can have cases where each parent claims for a different child without it being fraudulent.

https://www.gov.uk/hmrc-internal-manuals/claimant-compliance-manual/ccm18015

This talks about who has priority. Hmrc may have to decide who gets the money in cases where its disputed between the parents

There is always a primary residence regardless of this situation. Everyone has one. It’s no different from families with 2 homes.

Op this is a very easy no. Just explain his plan is unaffordable for you and it's not like it will be a massive windfall for him. He sounds greedy and stupid.

Regardless of a primary residence he can still legally counter claim if he pays towards their upkeep an amount equal to the CB amount. I'm not saying he'd be awarded it but he could try to claim it

A counter claim would be vexatious. He would be saying he wants a change to the status quo that she hasn’t agreed to. He can do it; anyone can waste their time on court proceedings they will lose. Given the details here, he would be wasting his time. The courts don’t tend to favour destabilising arrangements in which children are settled and have contact with both parents. Nor do they favour creating increased dependency on the state. Eg (different context) a will excluding a dependant daughter who should have become a burden on the state was overturned so that she inherited and remained independent of the state. Even with 50:50 custody, as the main carer the OP should be claiming from the father. He seems to be motivated by wanting free money, not by the best interests of the children. It’s not going to fly.

It wouldn't be a court issue for CB. It's decided by hmrc.

Only one person can get Child Benefit for a child.
You normally qualify for Child Benefit if you’re responsible for a child under 16 and you live in the UK.

You’ll usually be responsible for a child if either:

• you live with them
• you’re paying at least the same amount as Child Benefit (or the equivalent in kind) towards looking after them - for example on food, clothes or pocket money

I think it’s child tax credits that are up for grabs, not cold benefit, but it opens a bigger picture of residency, bedroom tax etc, so it would almost certainly snowball if he dig his heals in.

*child benefit

This. There's no 2 child cap for child benefit. You could claim it for a dozen children if you qualify. Get on it OP!

I'm sorry but you're wrong! That's the point I'm making. If there is shared care, whatever that looks like, either parent can claim child benefit. If they disagree about who should claim it, the CB agency will decide and look at factors that you mention but if they agree, the child doesn't have to move anywhere.

Also...claim CMS for your fourth child unless there's some very good reason to avoid the Dad.

I would not let him, for a start it would be fraud if they don't live with him, also he seems dodgy to me, like he's trying to claim and make out the two children live with him for some reason.
He earns a good wage and should be able to survive, his finances are not your problem.
100% no, he's up to something.

It wouldn't be fraud FFS

If he genuinely has 50/50, splits ALL costs related to the children, is a good involved father and reasonable person to deal with, then there is no reason why he shouldn’t be able to claim some of the child benefit. You have three children together though, so you claiming for a 4th (that isn’t his) is irrelevant to his argument. So it would be 1.5 children each, why would he think he can claim for two out of three of your shared children?

That’s irrelevant. If he is having them 50/50 then he is as entitled as his ex to child benefit.

Did you miss the bit where she says they live with him half the time?
Her finances are not his problem. She needs to get herself a full time job, and also claim CM from the father of her youngest child.

If people choose to stop working to look after children, then they may well find themselves in the OPs situation if the relationship breaks down. People need to take responsibility for their own actions!

Extremely selfish off him to even suggest that. Makes me soo angry when men do this when they're earning more. Us women have to always post pone or sacrifice our careers and life's when children come into it. Even worse when you break up and become a single mum too them all I understand this being a single mum too 4 and not having any help by friends and family to even go university! If you have the kids more than him he cannot claim it! Also tell him to fuck off like who is he too even suggest that when your having to rely on benefits to get by. What a fool! 🤦🏼‍♀️

@Helloyou111 Just say no and stop working around him then he can’t have the kids 50/50

who watches the kids when he has them if it’s 50/50

Why cant you have them more if you work part time ?
If your the one to be main carer( school , dentist , not working full time to accommodate him ) then make sure you protect yourself

Child benefit has no cap, I hope you’re getting the correct amount for all children @Helloyou111 . UC is 2 child cap unless exceptional circumstances, and as the non residential parent on 45k a year I can’t see how your ex is entitled to any UC top ups. Have you used a benefits calculator to check you’re receiving the correct amount?

https://www.turn2us.org.uk/

https://www.gov.uk/calculate-child-maintenance

@Helloyou111 also put in his wage and how many nights a year on average they stay over, I’d be shocked if it doesn’t work out far more than he contributes at the moment.

No. When there are two kids and it’s 50/50 they tend to give one Parent one claim each