Last minute school choice

[TenIl]

Hi all, DD is 10, she is in Y6 and will be moving to senior school this year. We were pretty much set (place accepted etc.) on a selective boarding school, 1.5 hours from home. However DD doesn't want to board (she was on and off about it so we accepted on the idea that once she had tried it she would love it and she has done lots of camps and been fine).
Now we are looking at a non-selective but highly regarded day school 25 minutes away on public transport. We were on the waitlist but got offered a place this week and have to decide ASAP.
Here is the issue, DD plays a sport to a high standard. Boarding school has a talent pathway for this which she was accepted on to and incorporates training into her day. Downside is DD currently attends a Language school in DHs first language (DD is Bilingual) on Saturday mornings which she wouldn't be able to attend (even with weekly boarding they aren't allowed to leave until after their last commitment and due to DDs sport she wouldn't be able to leave on time).
Day school doesn't offer this sport at all (well occasionally for kids who aren't on a team and just do regular PE).
Day school have however said we can set it up so instead of normal PE on Wednesday afternoon she could leave at lunch and go to coaching instead, we would have to arrange/pay for this and DD would have to make her own way there. Obviously the other option is we go for Day School and DD trains around school.
DD is still saying she doesn't want to board so one of the Day School options seem most likely. I'm not sure which is better though, missing school sports in favour of training or just training around school.
DD doesn't really see a career in the sport but is passionate about.
I think skipping school PE is a bad idea and it is important she doesn't limit herself so early?
DH thinks coaching instead of PE makes more sense and her coach she currently has, has said he would happily provide this.

So AIBU to think school PE> Coaching?

I think boarding is very isolating, she is very young. Pick the day school and work the rest out later. If you push her to board she will likely feel unwanted.

When you say she’d train around achool, what does that look like in practice ?

Most likely 3 hours on a Saturday afternoon, before school once or twice and after school some days.

Swap the PE for coaching. What is the sport?

Yea I agree school PE > coaching. We had to make the same decision and decided against skipping school PE because a) I think it’s important kids do a lot of different types of sport; both for their developing bodies and for long term love of sport - there’s quite a lot of evidence for the latter and b) if you skip school PE you sometimes also miss out on training for swimming galas, sports day etc which is all an important part of school life if you’re an athletic child.
Why not just do it evenings and weekends?

Do you have to decide about the sport right now? If she wants a day school, can you accept the place and provisionally agree she might take Wed PM off. I would imagine you can change your mind on this later, or maybe do a mixture e.g. one half term of training for her sport then one half term of PE.

Day rather than boarding seems clear since she doesn’t want to board.

As for sports training outside school time vs missing school for sports training - Honestly it depends on lots of things. Do you need to decide now? Can you wait and see?

Your DD may feel differently once she has made friends, she may not want to miss school sports with them, she may enjoy the Weds school PE lesson. She may be less interested in her sport altogether once tween/teen social life kicks in. Or she might think school PE is rubbish and jump at the chance to miss it for coaching.

I would ask your DD for their input as at that age, they’re old enough to give their thoughts.

If they don’t miss their PE sessions, it sounds like the training outside of school will be quite onerous. Is your DD wanting to devote so much time to this sport if she already knows she’s not interested in making it a career?

Whilst I would support any sports which my child wanted to pursue, if they don’t see it becoming a career, I would be concerned about dedicating too much time to that and not enough to other hobbies and academic work.

Would you or DH be able to ferry her to training and if not, would it involve much travel?

Most kids train around school, and (with exceof specialist sports colleges) where talent pathways exist that doesn't mean they offer the sport within school keeping them in school longer, but that they are more flexible on attendance to allow kids to train with their club or NGO.

I wouldn't even be considering boarding if sge doesn't want to go.
Am guessing the day school is private?

Is she national level or likely to make a national team or squad? Am sort of guessing it's an individual sport if she can arrange 121 training with her current coach?

I have seen a small number of kids reach that national/international or professional level and it does take a huge commitment. But I have seen plenty more kids put in that same commitment at the expense of school (and friends/social groups) and not make it.
The ones that have made it are not household names and have short careers.

I have also seen athletes have more success on switching sports....so doing school PE is likely to open up more opportunities in and make her happier and more well rounded, as well as help her make friends IMHO