I have two young children - a 3 year old and a 1 year old. I returned to work at the start of this month after having a year off. I am very fortunate in that my current job is extremely flexible - I work from home for 2 days a week, office based twice a week, then have every Friday off (plus weekends). I get 31 days of leave and the salary is reasonable for the position. The only drawback is that there is little room for progression, I'm at the top of my band and it's around 45mins to an hour drive from home, depending on traffic.
While I was on maternity leave, a job that I had been waiting to be created, became available. Unfortunately, we had a restructure, meaning I couldn't apply. I was gutted, tried looking around for similar roles and coincidently found one in an organisation closer to me. I applied and was offered the job. It starts on a lower salary than I'm currently on (just) but provides me with the opportunity to develop my career and move into management.
I met with the manager to provide some documents and I'm suddenly really torn about whether this is the right move for me, at this point in my life. He seemed great, the team is well established, and it will be a really challenging role for me.
Problem is...I'd be in the office 5 days a week, set times, between 8am - 4pm. I'd need to put my children in childcare for another day, costing me around £400 a month. There is scope to work from home, but obviously not immediately until I was settled in the team. It's closer than my current job, but still a rubbish drive, and the additional office days would cancel out any savings in fuel. The probationary period is a whopping 12 months (although I'd get continuous service, so I'm protected in terms of redundancy, mat pay, sick pay, etc).
I think if they'd agreed to my salary request I could have justified the move, but they'd only agreed to match my current salary (which is fair enough). That said, I work in an incredibly niche area, so the chance of something coming up again in the near future, so close to home, is fairly unlikely.
It would be a difficult year. We'd have less money, I'd have less time with my children. I couldn't apply for any kind of flexible working until next September, at which point my oldest would be at school anyway.
Am I being unreasonable by turning the job down? Should I be focusing on furthering my career, or being available for my children while they are so little? I've been told that this time goes so quickly so I'm reluctant to miss anything I don't have to, but also, I'm worried that this might be a good opportunity I'm passing by.
I appreciate it's a privileged position to be in, but I just need some input from other parents who may have had to make a similar decision.