I can't tell parents what happens at school

[9th]

I'm a parent of primary school children however I also work at the school and have done for the past year . the last few weeks ive had messages or other parents have came up to me asking to know about in school situations , lunch time issues or can I keep an eye on their child and another because of bullying I have told them if you have concerns you need to address them with the class teacher I am not the teacher and Im not allowed to talk about school incidents with parents or report things back to them I've tried to be nice in my response however now I've started being to the point
I have spoken to staff members saying Ive been contacted and they have said I've done the right thing and directed them back to school

But the parents just don't seem to understand as I've woken up to another message this morning

I find the best thing in this situation is to repeat the same sentence over and over.

• Do you know what happened during lunch yesterday? I am concerned about my DC
• I cannot discuss school matters with parents. Please contact the class teacher.
• Can you keep an eye X as I am worried about Y
• I cannot discuss school matters with parents. Please contact the class teacher.
• My child's shoes are lost, do you know where they are.
• I cannot discuss school matters, please contact class teacher.

Rins and repeat. I does tend to sink in quite quickly if you use the exact same wording every time.

Just keep doing what your doing and saying you can't discuss due to confidentiality. If it's the same people and they keep doing it after you've already said I personally would ignore it. They should no better really.

*know

rinse and repeat

Ignore the emails or when you do eventually respond, send the same stock phrase-they will soon give up.

Similar thing happened to me when I became parent governor at my DC's school. I would be sent screenshots of WhatsApp conversations between parents, with an accompanying "just so you know what's being said" type of message.

You are handling it correctly and eventually they'll get the hint.

This came up in my interview at school. It’s an absolute no and you’re right in what you’re doing (as you know).

"I would lose my job if I acted like a shortcut for you to skip proper school procedures. You need to ask your child's teacher, not me"

Agree you need to give exactly the same response to every request until they shut up.

Another vote for a rinse and repeat reply, almost like an automatic response. Have it saved in your notes and send the exact same message every time. I wouldn't even address them to their name, just "Hi Parent" or similar, so they get the picture.

To be honest , I'd block parents who insisted on doing this. Once, ok fine . Twice , not happy. Three times they'd be blocked. They gave no regard for you or your position and responsibility, they'd happily put you in a difficult situation and risk your job.

Agree with @Catza just keep repeating. They will get the message eventually.

It was nice when I work in my kids school, but it was also nice when I moved onto another school to as I stopped having to deal with this.

Make it clear you risk losing your job. You need to be that clear. Anyone who continues after that - ignore or block.
I’ve had to do this as a univ lecturer - some parents don’t like being told that I cannot by law tell them their 19 year old’s attendance rate or grades. If they try a second time I end the call and report it to very senior staff.

I would ask the head teacher to send a message reminding parents of the correct procedure to follow and to not approach staff directly.

Maybe give a reason why you can't. Due to GDPR and confidentiality I am discuss school matters with parents. Please contact the class teacher.

I think with emails it would be reasonable to reply that you can't deal with these matters but you have copied in X's class teacher / head of year for their information and any further queries should be directed to them.

Not replying is only likely to result in a flurry of emails asking if you received their original, asking for updates etc. Replying without copying in relevent person will result in requests for email addresses and / or to pass on messages.

Is there a reason that these parents have your contact details?

OP is also a parent at the school

You probably should send a message,copying in all the parents, informing them that you cannot divulge anything, parents need to speak directly with the head or the class teacher and you will not respond to any more messages of this nature.

@LakeTiticaca yes I'm a parent and have a lot of the mums on Facebook as known them for the last few years

Par for the course when you work at your child's school.

My aunt had the same problem back in the 1960s.

Just stick to your guns and they'll get fed up of asking.