Well, who is MOST unreasonable

[CatLoaf]

I've had a puking 10 month old to look after all day, while my partner has been out at relatives with 4 year old DD all afternoon (plus his mum, who can be quite trying). As soon as they were home this evening, DD was obviously dead tired and screaming and tantruming 🫥 I fetched her a story but it was the 'wrong one'. Then DP appeared and told me I was antagonising her, while I was trying to get her to bed. I just felt so DONE - looking after the poorly baby all day had done me in, I'd just got him down when they got in. Then being told I was being antagonising 🤯 So I left (slammed the front door, argh) for a walk around and left them to it. I definitely overreacted :( (And sent DP a message telling him all about the dinner I'd made which he could heat up - kinda passive aggressive.)

Most boring thread on MN probably, you're welcome:/

(I'm still out, sitting on a bench.)

I don’t think either of you are BU, just exhausted and overwhelmed after a difficult day for everyone.

No one is being unreasonable - you’re just both knackered with a 10 month old and a 4 year old. Getting some fresh air and time apart is the best thing you can do.
Until the youngest is at least 2 or 3 you will get lots of days like this. Grit your teeth - it will get easier eventually. Hope your little one better soon.

I'm literally sitting on a bench in tears (not very obviously, and blowing my nose on a bloody muslin).
Why why is it so shit sometimes. I felt like I was coping fine with DD, but us as soon as I even FEEL challenged I fly off the handle:(

I feel shit that I really slammed the door, plus chucked some stuff around downstairs before I left

We've all been there. You didn't shower yourself in glory, but you are also only human. I find in this type of scenario hands up apology to partner and a let's get on with the next bit usually does the job. Small children will try the patience of the most saintly of saints!

You were wrong to throw stuff around, slam the door and storm out when your DD was still up, especially as it was about her because she may pick up on that. Your DH didn’t help and you both just sound exhausted to be honest. Fingers crossed both kids sleep well tonight and you and DH can get some rest together.

You made him dinner - he’ll eat that and be over it. The hours of frustration I spent on my ‘favourite bench’ when my DD was playing up (furtively smoking) - you are not alone!
You both sound like you’re doing the best you can. Dry your tears, go back when you’re ready. Tomorrow is another day.

It's called parenthood. Hard work with little reward much of the time. Stay on the bench until you feel a bit calmer then go home and have a glass of wine

You must currently be cutting the most peculiar image. Stressed, exhausted & furious woman smelling vaguely of vomit sitting alone on a bench sobbing into a reusable baby wipe. And I mean that with absolute kindness!! Cos we have all been there in one way or another.

You sound like you need a hug & some peace & honestly it's not surprising cos kids are hard & sick kids are harder & then the wrong comment at the wrong time is enough to make you want to throttle someone. Or go sit quietly on a bench.

I'd send your other half a quick message to say you're OK, sorry for flying off the handle you're just knackered & having a breather.

Sending you strong mum-hugs