Driving instructor after lesson was due to start

[Latetocancel]

I had a driving lesson booked for 8.30am yesterday. I was so tired as I hadn’t slept well but set my alarm for 7:45. My instructor is often running 10-30 minutes late, so I looked at my phone as soon as I got up in case he had sent a text to say he was running late and then I could get a few minutes more sleep.

No such luck - so I got out of bed and showered had coffee woke myself up basically, to keep me going for the next few hours. I was wide awake by this point and texted him at 8:30am asking if he was going to be on time. He texted back at 9am saying he had just woke up and didn’t feel well.

AIBU for thinking he should have woke up by 7am (which is the time he would normally have had to wake up by in order to make it to my lesson at 8:30am) and sent me a text earlier rather than texting to cancel half an hour after my lesson was meant to start?

The thing is I need to spend the rest of the day exhausted for absolutely nothing. If I’d had the lesson in the morning, it would have been worthwhile to feel tired in the afternoon but the way I feel seems a waste considering he cancelled.

And to avoid a drip feed no I can’t do a catch-up sleep during the day . I have sleeping issues and if I nap I usually struggle to sleep at night,plus I just struggle to day-sleep anyway. I realise it’s not his fault I have sleep issues but surely common courtesy is he should’ve texted me in advance?

Honestly you should never hire anybody who doesn't respect your time. It's disrespectful and unprofessional, ditch him and find somebody else.

regularly running 30 minutes late? - doesn't sound v professional, even without the latest complete no-show

Do you always have this time slot - in which case must the the first or second of the day, not unreasonable to expect him to ne on time.
I had lessons in London, so the instructor was occasionally late because of traffic conditions, but rarely.
Find a decent instructor

I’m a driving instructor. Because I’ve got two kids and am the more available parent I don’t charge anyone for cancelling, as Sod’s Law one of my kids will be vomiting a few days later and I’ll have to give a free lesson (as the penalty should go both ways IMO).

He does sound unreliable, which I’d be annoyed at. I don’t blame him for cancelling when sick as illness would affect risk management, but he should’ve let you know earlier. Also he shouldn’t be late either, it isn’t professional.

But with only six weeks left I’d stick with him. You know the car and instructors generally all have waiting lists at the moment.

I mean, he’s unprofessional if he regularly runs late and cancels late

but such drama over having to get up at 7.45 🙄

@ThinWomansBrain Yes I’m the first slot of the day on a Sunday. We have had this slot two weeks running, this would’ve been the third .

When I first took lessons in my 20s this kind of thing was unheard of - at least with the instructors I had - but a decade later seems to be quite common unfortunately.

And it’s not just my experiences, it’s also what I read online in reviews.

My last instructor would text while I drove, the one before that was on the phone during my trial lesson. I reported both to their respective schools. So I think I’m being a lot more patient with this one because at least he’s not being unsafe during my lessons.

On a weekend it's early. The OP says she sleeps badly and this has affected her day, all for nothing. I have similar sleep problems.

Some people are also not natural early birds and imo early risers tend to scoff at others and be quite smug about their sleep patterns. God forbid they are disturbed later on in the evening though, they get very grumpy about that.

That’s great you don’t charge for cancelling! All the instructors I’ve had do!

Yeah I was hoping he would offer a free lesson but he never so I’ve just left it - don’t
want to ask if that’s not what he is offering.

Completely agree with him cancelling if he feels too unwell but yeah it’s just the timing of it! I’d have been grateful for a text an hour or so before it was meant to start.

exactly this.

I was actually an early riser for years until my sleep issues kicked off during the pandemic, but I’m glad I was never smug about it and understood some people need to sleep a bit more /later.

Bit off topic but I’ve been keeping it under control through walking a lot but recently had a wee injury while exercising 🤦‍♀️which is partly why it’s flared up a bit as I can’t walk as much right now.

Sorry to hear you deal with sleep problems too, it can be so awful!

Why are you so tired ? 7.45 is not early to get up

Thanks for the comments & votes!

Bit surprised to see 30% of the vote seemingly thinks it’s BU to expect a professional to cancel at least 90 minutes in advance of a scheduled lesson, rather than cancelling half an hour into the lesson time 🤔 Glad it’s not the majority though or I’d feel like I’d totally lost track of etiquette even more than I have 😅

Definitely is considered rude and inconsiderate in my world - even for hanging out with friends we’d let each other know beforehand if we couldn’t make it anymore but I guess that’s the ‘joy’ of AIBU - you get to hear a range of perspectives and see how others outside your bubble may think 🤷‍♀️

I agree though re. not doing pre 9am lessons again. Lesson learnt - pun unintended.

Also: He’s still faffing about with rescheduling, so if next week doesn’t happen I may need to cut my losses, postpone the test and find a new instructor who can respect my time more.

Onwards and upwards and all that jazz 🚘

It doesn’t seem fair you have to pay for cancelling and he doesn’t, but I guess that there’s a shortage of us out there and people can get away with it! But on the same foot lucky to get a Sunday slot, most charge extra for that.

I feel all happy about myself having read all this!