What are good ways to get dopamine?

[wiseoldsnail]

I've realised I need to find new ways to get dopamine. Trying to break a trauma bond from my ex husband on my own....10 months separated and haven't dated anyone. I want to heal as much as possible before I do this.

I do know that I relied on dopamine from my ex husband who was always hit and cold...the usual you get from a narcissistic person.

I just need to make myself feel good and confident and get that 'rush' feeling from myself to myself and no one else.

I have a job interview tomorrow so I'm hoping that goes well! First time I've been back to work in years - I've been a full time carer for my autistic son.

Completing tasks gives me a little dopamine hit.

Clearing out one drawer - ding!
Filling one bag to go to the charity shop - ding!
Cleaning the fridge out - ding!

It’s trying to find something that will give you that dopamine. The trauma bond can be difficult to break it’s almost as if you have to re-wire your brain. I love long walks in the forest or by the river. Just enjoying the fresh air and exercise. I also am a member of a gym which is amazing for my mental health. I always feel so much better when I’ve done a workout.
book yourself a little treat, manicure, massage or something that makes you feel good.

good luck with the job interview - you’ve got this

I have ADHD, and after an awful breakup, I found that tennis and table tennis helped regulate my moods. These sports keep my mind busy, so there's no time to overthink, and I don't have to talk to anyone while playing, but I'm still connected with others.

Weight training, can't beat it.

I'd agree with gardening, and crafting. Some time ago I experienced a massive trauma relating to my child. I went out into the garden, and hacked a huge bush from about 10 feet high, down to 2 feet. I got so involved in what I was doing, and the physical hard work of clearing it all up, that to my surprise, I felt much better.

Crafting is something else which takes complete concentration, and hopefully gives you something pretty to look at once you've finished.

Exercise of course is brilliant.

In fact, from my own experience, and reading what helps others, it would appear that doing anything which you have to give your complete attention to, helps to focus your mind on what you are doing, rather than giving you time to think about your problems or bad experiences.

It sounds like you've already made some massive progress OP. I wish you the very best of luck and happiness in the future.

Ritalin

For me:

strength training
walks in the woods or by the sea
cut flowers
lovely clean (new?) bedding
buying food that I enjoy and he didn’t

time 1:1 with friends or family who are supportive

definitely agree with the amazing effect of volunteering on mental health and mood- if you have time.

the book “get divorced, be happy” is quite fun.

good luck!!

Any walks in nature
Exercise
Music
Podcasts
Iron and B6 apparently are the vitamins you need