Accessible Seating - WIBU?

[Noopneep]

Today I travelled to visit family with my toddler and partner. We travelled by train. On the way home, I was feeling unwell and so asked for help with the ramp and to be placed in the accessible area.

When I boarded the train, two people were sat in the accessible seats. I asked if the people sitting in the seats required the accessible seats. The woman was rather haughty and said she needed them so she could be close to her luggage. She said that she'd booked seats elsewhere but they were full so she had to sit in the accessible seats.

There were plenty of non-accessible seats available. Due to my disability, the fold down seats are not suitable and I need the accessible seats as the other seats leave me cramped and in severe pain.

I was stunned by her attitude especially as her companion asked her if he should move and she said "no, stay where you are". I couldn't believe her complete lack of humanity. My partner politely stated that the seats were for those with disabilities, those who have issues standing etc. I couldn't believe her attitude so said "by not moving, you're essentially saying that your baggage is more important than someone's wellbeing". She said "I'm not saying that but I need to stay with my luggage". The train started to move so I sat in one of the many available non-accessible seats. It was cramped and I had to stretch my legs out into the aisle but had to keep moving to allow others to get by.

My little boy started getting upset as he couldn't see me. A woman passing asked him what was wrong and my partner said "he's looking for his mummy who's had to move because she's disabled and these people won't move". The woman with the luggage then claimed "that's not how it is at all".

My partner asked if the male could at least move to the fold up seat so I could sit down. They could still see their luggage but at least my pain wouldn't be worsened. He begrudgingly agreed to this.

The worst part is that I asked the guard and his response was to shrug his shoulder and state "nothing to do with me".

Since the accident that caused by disability, I've been very aware of not taking up space and I do try to not make a fuss but this has really upset me.

I guess the part I want to know if I'm being unreasonable about is whether I make this public. I have their picture and where they boarded. I'm sure I'm only saying it because I'm angry and humiliated but I don't know whether I should or not.

Lastly, if when I asked about whether she needed the seat. If she had said "yes", I wouldn't have said anything but it was the fact it was for the luggage that frustrated me.

AIBU for wanting to post this women's picture publicly. Was I in the wrong?

Don’t go down the photo route - that will just backfire.

Complain to the train company about the guard though. If he heard her say about luggage he should have told her to move as protecting the space for disabled people is part of their job. At the very least he should have asked her companion to move.

Posting her photo is a dick move.

Complain to the train company about the guard. They should be better trained on this, like bus drivers are supposed to be.

This is not victim blaming, this is addressing your remark that you try not to take up space as a disabled person. You are just as worthy of taking up space in life as the next person. Learn to take up space.

I'm disabled.

I don't ask if people need the seats anymore.

I just say bluntly are you disabled?

If yes fine, Anything else gets me saying Can you move please.

I hate travelling on public transport for this reason, although the access people who bring a ramp are happier to make people move.

A lot of the general public are cunts.

I was all ready to say YANBU until you wanted to post the woman's photo online. Complain to the train company for sure though, because the guard should have done something.

If she'd booked seats and someone was sitting in them the guard would have been able to get those people to move anyway.

And yes guard should have told them to move anyway.

So agree with first poster. Better to just complain to the train company

Yanbu, but do not post the photo. Complain to the train company because surely the guard should have done something. What would you have done though if all the accessible seats were used by people who genuinely needed them as well?

Yanbu that they were twats, but ywbvu to post their photo, ywbvu to even take their photo tbh.

If the guard can't do anything about seats, go plonk yourself in first class next time, and tell them why if they ask.

You're right. I was unreasonable to take the picture and to even consider using it. I just felt so angry. I've deleted it off my phone and I've put in my complaint to the rail company.

It's the guard (probably actually a 'Train Manager' or 'Revenue Manager these days) who is at fault here.

I would suggest next time, saying to the Train Manager - "I am disabled and need an accessible seat, please can you help?" - nothing about any other people or their luggage, just that request. If he refuses to help, mention that he may be breaching disability regulations.

The other people who wouldn't move - clearly they were in the wrong, but I do have some sympathy as they'd lost their booked seats, I can understand why they wouldn't want to move again and why they might have needed to be near their luggage (might contain medication for example).

That's the way to do it.

I've been very aware of not taking up space and I do try to not make a fuss but this has really upset me. no please take as much space as you need. It is not a "fuss" it is a requirement

I've just spoken to Transport For Wales and they don't reserve seats so she was simply lying.

I just can't get over her telling her companion not to move.

@LongSinceGotUpAndGone I did tell the guard I had a disability and needed the seats but he just shrugged his shoulders. I also had my disabled person's railcard as we were using it to travel.

@nobeans I know but it's how I feel. On one of my better days I managed to take my little boy swimming. I used the accessible area and had a woman banging on the door and shouting at me telling me I shouldn't be using it. She wanted me to get out so her child could use the toilet. There were two available toilets within a couple of meters. I was so shaken that I didn't take him again for nearly a year.

To be fair to the guard it's impossible for him to know who needs the seats. He has to rely on people not being dicks. If the woman had said to him she needed the seats he wouldn't have been able to question it.
He could have helped you find accessible seats somewhere else though.

unfortunately if people refuse to move there is very little the guard can do. Even if he could prove they didn't need the seats he has no way of physically getting them to move. Even if he called the police they are unlikely to physically move them.

They can upgrade the disabled person to first class (if the train has a first class section).