Older kid calling round to play with out with my younger kids

[AnythingBUTnursing]

This may sound crazy however, is it normal for a 12 year old to want to play out with my 5 and 7 year olds?

She knocks on the door and asks if they can come out to play. I just find it odd. I thought older kids were too cool for that.

She's probably bored and you don't get to choose the ages of the kids that live in your street.

So not that strange really.

I had this with my previous neighbours daughter. There is 7 years between her and my DC, she was 11 when we met her, she always loved calling over and playing with him, I sometimes thought it strange that she was so generous with her time with him but she genuinely liked hanging out with DC. We were semi rural but she had other buddies along the road.

She's 21 now and just called over the other day, even though we've since moved house, to tell us she passed her driving test! It's a friendship I hope continues because I'm mad about her ❤️

I think it is a bit odd tbh, how does she know them?

Your 5 and 7yr olds play out on the street on their own?

12 isn't that old and it's not that strange for older girls to like little kids.
My 6 year old often plays with the 11 year old daughter of a friend.

Its really, really good for children to play in mixed age groups. Its a real loss to children nowadays that so many children do not get the opportunity to do so. Your children and this girl will get a lot out of this and learn a lot from each other. Its really good for all of their development.

Let them play.

Depends on the kids. My NDN has a DD who is about 4/5 years younger than my DD. NDN was much in demand as a playmate by the younger kids and was great fun and very kind with them. Lovely bunch of mixed aged girls all played pretty well together.
I'd be slightly more wary if the older child was very immature and seeking younger friends - not necessarily stop the friendship but just keep a closer eye.

When I was about 10 me and friend (also ten) used to call on a little girl who was about 5 and teach her to rollerskate. We called it Chloe's rollerskate club.

we used to knock and say it's time for Chloe's lesson

as an adult it was a little bit of an odd game 😂 but we were just kids and we all enjoyed it. I mean if your kids like playing with the girl I don't see an issue

The 12 year old lives round the corner they met when my girls were playing out the front. My kids are supervised by me or their dad. I feel they are too young to be left alone.

I am finding it difficult as now she knocks on the door. But it isn't always a great time as I am not always readily available to sit and supervise.

Just unsure how to handle it. I just have a strange gut feeling something is "off" but maybe that's just because I don't have any experience with this.

I don't want to get in their way of making friends. However I also want to protect them. The joys!

When I was that age I used to go and play with a neighbours kids who were 2 and 5, I always liked playing with and looking after younger kids.

I loved playing with younger kids when I was that age then I moved on to babysitting and eventually I went on to make childcare my career.
If you feel something is off or it’s not convenient then say no.

Me too, I had some younger friends in neighbours kids.

But then I have a friend at my yard I ride with who is probably only about 10 -12. 😆 Wonder if that means I'm immature...

It’s alright to say no or not right now perhaps suggesting a time where you can sit out.

Not odd at all really, especially if they are no other children of her age.

My own daughter has played out with a girl 4 years older than her since she was 7.

Honestly as an adult i have friends who are 5+ years older or younger. Doesn't really matter we just enjoy each other's company.

This is so lovely 😍
When i was about that age I used to absolutely love hanging out with the littlest kids at school - my friends and I had some sort of lunchtime monitor role where we were "on duty" in the infants playground, and had a little gaggle of adoring 5 year old following us round. It's a very normal and healthy thing, I think (unless it isn't, but only you can judge that).

There's many innocent possibilities here - for instance maybe Your kids are the only ones nearby (or the only ones nearby who aren't cruel to her); or maybe when she sees your children enjoy playing with her she thinks the right thing to do is to offer to play with them again, because she's brought up to do nice things.

But that doesn't mean you should allow them to do anything you're uncomfortable with, even if the only reason you're uncomfortable is an "off" feeling - sometimes such feelings turn out to be right.

Thank you all, for some perspective.

If your gut is telling you something is off then don’t ignore this intuition. I wouldn’t allow them to play together if this is what your gut is telling you. Spidy senses are there for a reason.

To add, I think it very much depends on what they're doing. If she's playing with them at their level and in an age appropriate way, all good. If she's trying to introduce them to 12 year old things then that's not OK and you'd be right to put a stop to it.

When I was a child (back in the 80s) all the children on my road would play out together age range approx 4-13. My sister in particular loved organising games for the younger children, she's headteacher of a primary school now.

When I was 12, I used to play with a little girl across the street who was 6 and we’d play with dolls and watch Playhouse Disney! I think the difference was that this little girl would always ask for me rather than the other way around, but it was good fun! 12 is a tricky age as stuck between kid and teen, I remember it was nice to be a “kid” for a while and play at being a big sister.