My friend/cousin has ghosted me. Bit of background: we’re similar age early 30’s, worked in the same place closely for years, one of my closest friends & she was a bridesmaid at my wedding.
Early on during Covid my partner saw her at a supermarket & she was quite rude to him. This is where it starts:
I tried calling her to see if she was ok, I text her, watsapped her & no reply. I called her sister (my other cousin who I’m also close to & was also a bridesmaid at my wedding) who confirmed she hadn’t changed her number. She adv that her sister was stressed as she felt all the responsibilities of caring for her dad during covid had fallen on her.
Her 2 sisters either had to isolate themselves due to health reasons or don’t drive so as she was a single non vulnerable person it naturally fell to her.
Family history: Our fathers were brothers, her dad (my uncle) was an alcoholic) who after being kicked out & taken to court by said cousin & his ex wife stayed with members of my family. None of which could tolerate him, he was drinking heavily & abusive whilst drunk. Although my nan eventually kicked him out after a violent incident (my dad had to remove him after he pushed my Nan). After which she still washed his clothes, cut his hair/nails & cooked for him & made him sandwiches to take home. Every few weeks he’d get abusive & my nan would kick him out but then the dust would settle & she’d take him back but this couldn’t happen after 1 row they had during covid.
So throughout covid my nan couldn’t visit him as she was classed as vulnerable & my dad & his sister didn’t want to after what he’d done to my Nan.
Unbeknown to my family my uncle had a stroke etc & eventually passed away in his sleep.
My cousin was very withdrawn at the funeral & did not speak to me unless I spoke to her & she completely ignored my nan.
fast forward to this last month or so & despite more messages of support I hear nothing from her.
I finally saw her at a supermarket & she was content to ignore me completely so I confronted her.
She tried going into details of what my nan/dad did/didn’t do when my uncle passed. I don’t know much about it & said as much & asked why she’s also ignoring me when I haven’t done anything.
She said she doesn’t want to start an argument over it & it would probably turn into one if we were to hang out!
I said we don’t have to talk about it & said I’m always here etc. she seemed ok with this.
I messaged her to say happy birthday & she’s not even read it.
It Really bothers me & plays on my mind but I don’t know why? My husband says it’s ridiculous how much I worry about it.
Am I the problem? What can I do to stop it popping in my mind all the time?