Please help me plan my divorce

[Annabananaisadevil]

Hi all,
Long time lurker, first time poster here.
I married my husband 18 years ago in an arranged marriage, outside of UK. He was abusive and controlling from the start but I was young and naive with no life experience so did not have the courage to call it out.
We moved to UK about 10 years ago. We have three DC. We also own a house together. There is nothing else that legally binds us together.
I want to leave him. I’m desperate but DC1 is a sensitive child and will be doing GCSEs next year.
I know that he will make my life hell. He knows that he can push me around through the kids. He is aware that I would have left him long time ago if it wasn’t for the kids. (Context: we had moved countries and were extremely vulnerable in a new country)
Please help me plan my escape. I would be able to make ends meet, Just about without him. But how do I get rid of him? He is 50% owner of the house and won’t go willingly. Although, I earn twice his salary and can pay the mortgage on my own but he cannot.
My timeline is 2 years as that’s how long it will take me to arrange some other things.

I would contact Women's Aid:

https://www.womensaid.org.uk/information-support/

Tbh I'd go to a solicitor now. The courts are so backed up it would probably take two years before you were finally divorced anyway. I'd file the papers now x

@Boomer55 thanks for your response. I’ll have a look at their website. I called them once in desperate times and couldn’t get through to them for days. I gave up in the end.
Our marriage is not registered in the UK. I was wondering if I should do that first as it would make it easier to divorce him. Are there any down sides to doing this ?

Do I need a court to decide whether or not we can be divorced ? I am totally clueless on this. I thought I could divorce him one-sided, if that makes sense.

I cannot live in the same house as him once I start the divorce proceedings. I plan to move to another country with the DCs. He can be very aggressive and I don’t want to out the kids through that.

Women's aid and spea to the police if you are fearful of violence.
As Women's aid for legal recommendations.
Have you looked for support from organisations that help women in forced marriages?

I'm not certain of the process, but can't you file for divorce yourself, then split assets I.e sell the house etc.

I think your first step should be a divorce solicitor. Good luck. It's awful knowing you want out but having to wait to plan it.

@Happyddays thank you. I will speak to women’s aid. It was not a forced marriage, just one that wasn’t right for me.

@Clueless2024 thank you for understanding. I feel horrible. Constantly thinking about getting away. I’m so stressed all the time.

If your marriage is not legally recognised in the UK then you should see a solicitor for advice asap as it will change what you are entitled to and what you have to do next

If thats the case, if you are constantly stressed etc then don't wait! I don't know it that's an option for you. But see a solicitor ASAP. It might seem like it sets off a bomb, but the dust will eventually settle.