How to teach my kid not to be mean?

[Khlgfswh]

Ds is in yr1 primary and Ibhave heard from others that him and his friend can be quite mean to other kids. He is fine with other kids one to one but when he is with his best friend it seems it's not always kind to others. I get the impression that his best friends mum is not very welcoming of a chat about it. I have spoken to the school to see if they could be supervised better at playtime. I have repeatedly spoken to DS about it. Any tips on what strategies worked for you?

Try 3rd party comic strips.

Basically draw the situation.

2 friends stood together and being unkind - everyone else far away and playing together.

Then show him walking away from that one friend towards the big group.

Get him to think about whether they are going to let him in to play if he's unkind? Really get him to think and explain why.

Hopefully he'll understand they won't and he'll be that lone figure on the page away from his best friend and the larger group.

Quite often young children need visuals because their brains aren't yet developed enough to fully grasp the long term consequences of their actions and they see the here and now.

So right now he sees he has an ally just for him. His best friend. Someone always by his side. He can't see that his behaviour around this jeopardises future friendships.

Also I agree that it's great that you're trying to deal with this rather than just shrugging and hoping for the best.