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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Anyone else doing nothing this long weekend?

7 replies

PinkyBlueMe · 25/05/2024 18:09

Feeling a bit meh! The DC are 17 and 16 and have plenty going on - out with friends a lot and DS16 doing bits of revision in between.
However, me and DH simply cannot kickstart a social life.
Over the years we've had friends but if we don't make the effort they don't and we cool it when we realise how one sided it is. 2 recent'ish examples:
Became good friends with couple 1 and initially both sides made effort or hosted BBQs etc. For last 3 years they have not invited us to anything. If we invite them, they either don't reply at all, or they come but make no effort in between. For last year we haven't made an effort or invited them so not seen or heard from them. Our DC get on with theirs so they're all in touch.
Couple 2 we've been friends with for a few years but recently we got friendlier and they invited us to theirs for dinner and we reciprocated, a few times. However the last 2 times we've invited them (we went to theirs last), they haven't responded at all. Then they got in touch a few days after the date had passed to say "omg, so sorry, totally forgot to reply, why didn't you remind us?"
Just feel a bit insulted that someone can forget an invite or not reply at all.
Is this common? Or are we just unlucky with our "friends".
Btw above are just 2 examples, there are others.
AIBU to feel snubbed or hurt when people can't even be bothered to reply? Of course, I'm not persisting with these friends but I'm a bit flummoxed as to how people can simply not reply at all!
I'd love to have people to hang out with on long weekends or anytime really, and end up feeling lonely when all around us are BBQs and gatherings, but am giving up because we can't even get a yes or no if we invite people!

OP posts:
FairyCakesss · 25/05/2024 18:18

Sorry but why can't you do something together 🤔

Isseywith3witchycats · 25/05/2024 18:20

My OH has not been well recently so though there are things we could go to we are not going staying at home so he can recuperate

PinkyBlueMe · 25/05/2024 18:22

We can and do, but sometimes I feel like being sociable. This weekend having made an invite we kept the day free pending a reply, but we'll make it work and do something.

OP posts:
Echobelly · 25/05/2024 18:23

We're not - oldest DC is mid GCSEs, DH is out of work (though with savings), I've been out of work for a month and I just got a (fortunately very good) job offer yesterday so only now can I think of doing anything that involves spending money, and DS has a scout camp midweek, but revision for school tests either side of that so, no, we are not doing anything.

Augustus40 · 25/05/2024 18:25

I am lazy socially as I need a lot of me time but live with my 19 year old ds. So although I am not going out I prefer a simple life to start with.

Many people are not good at replying though. I am good at responding but I think many are not.

PinkyBlueMe · 25/05/2024 18:25

Congratulations on the job @Echobelly that must be a relief.
I've had a tough time with my job lately which has just eased so I fancied being sociable. DS who should be revising is actually out and about but just for one day then hopefully he'll knuckle down.

OP posts:
PinkyBlueMe · 25/05/2024 18:27

Thanks @Augustus40 - I think that answers my question. I'm good at replying too, so find it difficult to understand when an invite is ignored.

OP posts:
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