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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Should my 11 month old still nap on me?

67 replies

allbeth · 25/05/2024 07:43

My 11 month old dd still sleeps on me for all her naps. My mother and sister have asked me why I don't put her in her cot for naps when I'm at home. I simply don't want to. She seems happy sleeping on me. My dm thinks she will nap for longer in her cot, is this true?Sometimes she naps for an hour of two on me, sometimes it might only be 30mins. Surely this is completely normal for a baby to have inconsistent nap lengths? It does not bother me in the slightest. Should I be putting her down for naps at this age?

OP posts:
KEG05 · 25/05/2024 07:45

I’d let her nap on you if you both like it. This time is precious and over far far too quickly. Soak it up and enjoy.

Hiddenvoice · 25/05/2024 07:46

It’s entirely up to you where your baby sleeps. If you’re still happy to contact nap then please continue it.

My two year old always contact napped whenever I was able to. When she got a bit bigger she didn’t want to cuddle In to me but liked to sleep on the couch, knowing I was there. This never impacted her night sleep and she slept through the night, in her own room, with no problems.
She now has decided she doesn’t need naps most days so I follow her lead.

Some people prefer to put little ones in the cot so they can practise self soothing and so the parent can get some time to themselves. Other parents prefer a contact nap instead. If you want to keep doing it then please do, don’t let them change your mind if you’re happy with how things are going.

AllThePotatoesAreSinging · 25/05/2024 07:49

Mine does too. She’s my last baby and I’m not ready to stop.

Safxxx · 25/05/2024 07:49

Enjoy it while you can....you are also resting with her so all good. Xx

GirlInTheMirror27 · 25/05/2024 07:49

If you are both happy with it then it's ok. My son used to nap on me and those memories and photos I have of him doing that are priceless.

Tospyornottospy · 25/05/2024 07:50

You clearly say you want to - and she wants to too! That’s pretty clear and simple. Really miss contact naps with mine; as with most of these stages they are over too soon. Enjoy x

Emotionalsupporthamster · 25/05/2024 07:55

Aw I miss those lap naps. It’s totally fine, keep enjoying those lovely precious times.

Flubadubba · 25/05/2024 08:00

We did this until we got to 11 months, and then had to try to reduce this so nursery wasn't such a shock....so I would say to think about your personal circumstances and what may be coming :)

MissHavershamReturns · 25/05/2024 08:03

Definitely ok. Did this with both of mine as babies and actually also co slept at night until age 3 or 4. Then they went into their own beds.

VictoriaStreet · 25/05/2024 08:13

Mine did this, I loved it. Enjoy it, soon it'll just be a lovely memory.

Savoydone · 25/05/2024 08:15

Absolutely fine but you might find it handy at times if she is also comfortable napping elsewhere.

GeckoFeet · 25/05/2024 08:15

When do you get things done? Genuine question as naps were my life line haha.

nickelbabe · 25/05/2024 08:17

Yes, she should nap on you.
Keep cuddling her for as long as you want.
It's your baby, not theirs.
it's impossible to spoil a child with love

Singleandproud · 25/05/2024 08:17

It's fine, like breastfeeding contact naps enforces the mother to sit down and rest meaning you are better prepared for the broken nights.

Parents who put their baby in the cot to nap or have other people bottle feeding their baby often don't get enough rest as they are whizzing around getting jobs done and doing various chores and then struggle more with broken sleep.

I would make sure that the naps are in your bedroom rather than a sofa though so you can rest properly and you may find that as the weather gets warmer she doesn't physically want to be on you but touching you still.

Namerchangee · 25/05/2024 08:18

Let your little one sleep on you and enjoy it OP. My youngest never ever slept in her cot - only on me or in her pram or car seat. You do what feels right for you.

Babybabyyy · 25/05/2024 08:21

I would never get anything done! My DD is 10 months and has napped in her cot since she was a couple of months old. Contact naps are sweet, but I need that time to do things.

daffodilandtulip · 25/05/2024 08:22

Enjoy it while you can.

However, are you a SAHM or will she soon be going to childcare? It can be very distressing for them to suddenly need to self soothe.

QueenOfDuisburg · 25/05/2024 08:24

My favourite memories of maternity leave with all three of mine is cuddling up on the sofa together while they napped on me. It doesn't last long - enjoy it while you can.

user1483387154 · 25/05/2024 08:26

If you are both happy then enjoy and cherish the time, you are not doing anything wrong

ClonedSquare · 25/05/2024 08:53

I think look ahead to what you need to do in future. If you're back to work in a month or two and she has never had a non-contact nap, I think you're setting her up for problems.

If she's going to be home with you for the foreseeable then there's less pressure to change soon, but you might want to practice cot naps for when she's too big to comfortably lie on you for hours!

Original poster
allbeth · 25/05/2024 08:55

Thank you for all your lovely comments, I do love it so will carry on. To answer a few questions - I do struggle to keep on top of things like cleaning/tidying etc. by I've never been on top of those things to be honest 🙈

My dd will be starting nursery in September, just for 1 day a week to start with. I think she'll be ok napping there as she settles herself well when I put her to bed at night.

OP posts:
karottybagel · 25/05/2024 08:55

If you're fine with it it's fine. It won't be forever.

Twentypastfour · 25/05/2024 08:55

Oh this was the best part of having babies / toddlers!

My kids are older now and I am so, so glad I soaked all of that up as much as I could.

IcePoleQueen · 25/05/2024 09:00

My daughter is 3.5 and most nights I don't put her down in her cot to go to sleep. I lay on the sofa, she lays on me, her head on my chest and we cuddle. I love it. She loves it. I won't always be able to do it. She'll grow out of it as she gets older. So, I'm making the most of the time I have with her now while she's still little and enjoys a cuddle with her mum.

Twentypastfour · 25/05/2024 09:00

Oh and one of mine went to nursery from one.
Every nap at home was either in the pram or sling or breastfed and held for the nap. Naps great from day one at nursery.

Continued to breastfed and contact nap at home. Toddler never once self settled for a nap at home or slept in an cot until napping stopped (not a problem with me) but was napping on their own on a little floor bed Mon - Fri at nursery.

I know SO many people with this experience. We were all terrified that we somehow had to prepare our babies for a nursery routine at home and obviously we couldn’t really but then every one of us discovered that nursery is just a different environment and the baby behaves completely differently there. All the worry was unfounded.