Secondary School Parents' Evening Etiquette

[tulippa]

Genuine question here as not sure who was in the right and if this woman was BU.

Parents' evening for DS Year 10. DH and I were waiting to see a subject teacher who was over-running. Our appointment was 5.55. It's 6.05 and the teacher is currently talking to another parent. We've been waiting since 5.55.

Other parent appears and stands next to us. She asks us what our time is. We say "5.55", she says "mine's 5.40". Nothing else is said.

Parent currently with teacher finishes and leaves. 5.40 mum swoops in and takes her place in front of the teacher without a word.

Was she right to do this her appointment was earlier? Or should we have gone as it wasn't our fault she was late and we were there first?

I'd think of it like the doctors, if they're running late you still do the slots in order.

Ex Secondary teacher here.
Firstly, teacher should not be running behind by ten minutes (am assuming appointments are 5 mins?) but I would always see parents in the order they were on the sheet. Just made things easier with having books/scores available.

Secondary school teacher here- appointment times mean nothing, it's a free for all. Be assertive and patient.

All of our schools now have bells and clocks. You only get your 5 minutes.

You were queuing and she was before you.

There is no right or wrong, really - but she wasn't wrong, and neither were you. This is why online is better, the website only connects you for your allocated appointment time, and no over run, or swapping

She should have waited to go after you.
We had Yr 10 parents evening last week. The appointment system was a joke. They made an announcement when you were supposed to move on... everyone was ignoring it. It was meant to be 4 mins per teacher, the pupil in front of us at the maths teacher had 20 minutes. We missed the English teacher at our appointment time as her queue was too long for me to stand in (I have a disability), so we went to the French teacher as she was free. We went back to English at the end & waited for 45 mins to see her. (I had to find a chair & go to the front when my daughter called me over.). Our last app was meant to be at 5.35. It was 7pm when we were done!
But everyone just queued, regardless of when their time was. There was no pushing in.

They never run according to time, whoever has the earliest time slot goes next, if you miss any teachers just email in for feedback. It’s frustrating but a 5 minute time slot just doesn’t allow for a conversation and movement time to the next appointment.

This is why I was overjoyed when our secondary school introduced online parents evening, you get 4 minutes with a teacher and it cuts you off no over running. They do a parents evening for those who prefer face to face but I'd never go to another like that again, once was enough

The 5:40 parent might have had to go off and do another session because this teacher was running behind. We’ve had to do that before, because otherwise we would start being late for every appointment because one teacher was taking longer

Face to face parents evenings are bonkers at secondary school. You have to sharpen your elbows and be assertive, or clone yourself.

I agree about online parents' evenings. So much easier.
I'm used to making sure my elbows are sharpened before I go and will grab an empty teacher out of turn if it's close enough to a scheduled appointment but I wouldn't expect to go in front of someone who was already standing in the queue. I wouldn't ask them what their time was.

I don't see anything wrong with this, they were due at 5:40 - 15 minutes before you - and as such were waiting even longer. Just because you happened to be sat there, why does that mean her place in the queue is now invalid?

And asking what time you were scheduled makes sense also; to gauge just how far behind the teacher was.

She was right to go first. Rather than being late, she may have been there in time for her 5:40 appointment, but given up and popped off to see another teacher and come back.