To think he would rather this.... then actually see me in person.

[Onasummerseve]

Been together for just over a year and lately has has started asking for a "photo" of me (you can guess what kind). I haven't sent him one as I would rather see him in person.

However, he seems more interested in a photo than actually seeing me in person?

Can anyone help me with reasons why he would be thinking that way?

I know there is noone else before anyone suggests that however I can't see any benefit of him having a photo over seeing me in the flesh?

Your thoughts would be appreciated.

Although it's highly unlikely, you need to be aware of the 'deep fake' porn that is out there. A relatively computer savvy person can take a still photo and make a scarily realistic porn 'movie' with it, either for their own 'enjoyment' or to distribute online, sometimes for money.

In this day and age I wouldn't send anybody a nude photo, even if all they wanted it for was wank-fodder.

I don't think he wants it for anything sinister to be honest.

I have a feeling he's got a library of photos from women and he contacts a few of you regularly to be honest.

Because it's hot to exchange pictures and know that you're thinking about each other when you're apart? Because it's sexy, fun? Take a picture of your legs or something, it doesn't have to be anything particularly identifying.

But I'm not sure I would do this for someone who hadn't been around for 2 months tbh - are you still actually together?

He doesn't want a picture of just her legs.

I would think it's easier than making any effort with you op.

Some people can be very convincing, very believable that they are charming, nice people who wouldn't hurt a fly. They're not always. You were concerned enough to start a thread about this, that concern is trying to protect you, please listen to it.

Surely this explains why he wants it then? Personally I think you're overthinking this, but if that's how you feel, fair enough - have this conversation with him.

I love sending/receiving X rated pics, if I was with someone who had an opposing view, I might reconsider getting into a relationship with them (obviously it would depend on what else we were/weren't aligned on - I wouldn't give up an otherwise perfect for me person just because they didn't want to send a picture).

I can think of reasons he would keep tount in about this. They're not great -

To show off, to share, to sell, to doctor, to use against you, to look at after you've broken up.

You haven’t seen him for 2 months?

This is not a relationship it’s just mucking about, meeting up for sex and/ or sharing wank photos.

Thats fine if it’s what you want too but don’t think it’s exclusive or heading anywhere meaningful.

It seems clear that he’s not keen to meet up anymore. He wants you for sexting and the occasional photo.

I think it’s best to take the hint (he doesn’t want a relationship) and block him.

He does still want to meet. He has asked on many occasions. However as stated above, we are both busy and the times have not been convenient for me and vice versa.

However, I feel that he puts more energy into trying to get a photo.

Writing it down as actually helped me unpick it all.

The fact that he hadn’t been trying very hard to meet up or see you tells you everything I think.

2 months is a long time to be busy.! Is he hooking up with other people?
Perhaps neither of you have time for a relationship?

Is he actually interested in you as a person? In what’s going on in your life?

Its a clear indicator if he just wants to flirt, ask for pics over SM and talk about sex- he’s telling you that’s all he wants and he doesn’t respect you as a person.

Some women think it’s flattering to be asked for pics. I personally don’t and if he’s repeatedly asking when you say No then he’s ignoring your boundary.

What he wants is to break your boundaries.

Fuck him.

To be honest it is me that has not been seeing him. I know I can see him any time I want to and he will make himself available. I'm not sure why I'm making this so different. We don't do the flirt/sex talk as previous poster mentioned. May be that is why I have been a bit taken back about him asking for a photo.

This is a bit confusing 😂

Hes not trying very hard to meet? Then you say He’s asked many times to meet? He’s been too busy? Then you say He will make himself available any time you want?

Is he trying hard to meet up with you or not ? You’re contradicting yourself a lot here.

If you’re not that bothered about seeing him and you feel uncomfortable that he keeps “trying hard” to get you to send sex pics, then just end it.
It sounds like it’s petering out anyway. That happens sometimes and means you weren’t actually that compatible.