I’ll try (and probably fail) to keep this short…
A group of six of us go away together two or three times a year. Sometimes we won’t all go if we’re struggling to get the same time off; sometimes other mutual friends may join us. But it’s us six at the core.
My friends Mike and Louise (married couple) are very close to Louise’s sister, Kate, and she’s been away with us a few times. We all get on really well, so when it was her 30th birthday, she invited the whole group to join her on her birthday weekend away.
The only person going who I hadn’t met yet was a woman called Cathy. Like me, she met Kate through Mike and Louise. I was travelling up with them and all the way they were saying, “I can’t believe you haven’t met Cathy before; she’s so nice, such a laugh, you’ll love her…”
Of course, this was the kiss of death 🙄 I found Cathy rude, domineering and generally a pain. She kept interrupting people, which is one of my pet peeves; she made quite a harsh judgement about one of my friends; some of the things she claimed about herself were at best suspicious and at worst just lies.
On the last day, we were all chatting about our favourite holiday resort, which is lovely but expensive. Mike said “Why don’t we plan in advance for next year and get a big villa? If we book quickly we can get a deal”. Everyone was very keen, including me. Then I heard Mike say, “You’ve never been before, have you Cathy? You’ll love it”.
My heart absolutely sank. It was entirely my own fault - of course he was including her in the invitation when she was sitting right there, but I’d heard “we” and automatically thought of our usual group. I’d been very enthusiastic a few moments before, so I couldn’t suddenly say “Oh well actually, I’m not sure”, but I was already planning my excuses. The thought of a week in a villa with her made me shudder.
However, salvation may have come in the form of procrastination and indecision 😄 Basically every time someone suggests a particular villa, someone else finds a problem: it’s too small, too expensive, too far from town… Anyway, two of my friends have clearly got fed up waiting and have messaged the group saying they’re booking their own accommodation and to go ahead with the villa without them.
Should I do the same? Obviously I’d rather Cathy wasn’t going at all, but it’s not like I can ask for her to be uninvited! So maybe being able to have my own accommodation, and somewhere to escape to when she gets too much, could be the answer. Maybe I’ll find her less difficult in a more relaxed setting - after all, three of my close friends think she’s fantastic, so I could be missing something. Or am I burying my head in the sand?