New House Neighbours

[Myrkk]

Sorry for the long post. I'm at a loss what to do.

We moved house a few months ago to our {we thought} forever house. From the moment we moved in it was lovely. Then 3nights after we moved in the neighbour came to complain we were parked in front of our house and it was causing her an issue. We have a cottage with parking under both windows, they have a 2bed cottage with, well no parking. She kept shouting "one cottage, one car" and started with "you have been told". My hubby had answered the door and was a little shocked and when I went through to defuse the situation she was super grumpy with me too and walked off shouting "one cottage, one car" like a little mantra. A couple of days later I heard him complaining about us to someone from the village (it's a tiny village) who thankfully said they've just moved in give them a break. A couple of weeks later one of their cats went missing and I found it hiding behind one of our sheds and couldn't get it out so called her to come around and get it. No thanks, except a post of face book later on.

Fast forward and her cats are fighting on our roof outside our bedroom window, stalking our elderly dog, using our veggie beds as a litter tray and worst of all, one of our dogs nearly caught one of them as they are so fearless. I used to lift them and pop them on the shed next to our wall, but they then thought it was ok to come into our house so I now spray them with water to get them to run off.

If I'm out speaking to the other neighbour who I go for coffees with occasionally, he'll shout Hi x and ignore me. I usually say hi and smile but have given up doing this over the last few weeks.

My Mum staying over involves her sleeping in the bedroom that overlooks their garden and he will stand an stare in the window at her moving around in the room.

Her hubby keeps putting our bins against our front door and today when I heard it I went out and said could you pop them against the side gate rather than slamming them off the front door which is what it sounded like he did. He moved them and then told me I was rude and he didn't slam them against the door, to which I replied you did last week. I also asked what we had done to get such rude behaviour from them to which he walked away.

I'm at a loss as I feel stressed in our garden, and I love my garden, and it is taking the shine off our new home. I've said to my hubbie maybe this won't be our forever home after all, but my Mum says we should stick our grounds until they move.

AIBU, I'm worried if they're doing this around the village we'll get a name so I'm being scrupulously friendly to everyone.

I'm not clear on the parking situation. Is this street parking, or is there is a carparking area in front of the cottages?

I'm a bit confused, is it 2 designated parking bays for your cottage or just parking on the road outside?

Diagram needed. By cottage do you mean a terraced house in the South of England?

Mumsnet rules= diagram

Them's the rules OP

But they sound batshit

You're giving these idiots far too much headspace. Kill them with kindness and allow them to continue to make fools out of themselves. Do what you want, park where you want and ignore ignore ignore. I assure you that everyone knows what these people are like.

I'm end of a terrace of cottages. There is a car wide strip of tarmac outside the house which is owned by the house. We can do whatever we want on this strip of tarmac and we were sold the cottage as two car parking spaces. There is a further strip of bricks just wider than a car next to the road which is owned by the council. It is a very busy road and all cars park on the pavement or in the occasional layby (we don't have one of those) and all neighbours park on the tarmac outside their houses.
I've spoken to the guy who owened the house before us and he said she tried parking her car there and got shirty when he said she couldn't park on his property. So I'm thinking this is them trying to mark their territory with the newbs.

They have the same strips outside their house but she finds it difficult to get her car into the space if we're parked in our car park space. It has now escalated to you can't put your bins in that spot either as it causes her issues getting her car up the pavement (we have a dropped kerb at our bit), hence him moving our bins.

Just ignore them- like really ignore them. Park your cars/ put your bins where you are allowed. If they move your bins put them back. Get a ring door bell. Go out and enjoy your garden and pretend they’re not there. I have a nightmare neighbour and found that when we first moved in I was being very accommodating of her odd ways. She never saw this as me being neighbourly, more went home and wondered what else she could do to try and cause bollocks. I just stopped talking to her in the end- they can’t upset you if you don’t listen.

Still need a diagram as this bit isn't clear -

she finds it difficult to get her car into the space if we're parked in our car park space.

If you are being considerate about where you put your bins, tell him to get his hands off your bins.

Tell her to learn to drive. Tell her you'll park your cars on your property & it's not any of her business.

Don't pussyfoot around the twats to try to impress the village, they'll all know what their like!!

Dont let them spoil your new 🏡

@Myrkk Bloody neighbours.. slight issue with mine today. Daren't go into detail. I'm so sorry, why DO people have to behave this way?
Sounds like 'they've lived there longer than you & therefore have more rights' Don't let them bully you. I shall try & take my own advice, too.

They are bullies OP, your mum is absolute spot on with her advice.
In fact I think it will do you the world of good when she comes to stay.
You have done nothing wrong, so stand your ground.
I hope you have a lovely time out in your garden with your mum. Just get on with doing what makes you happy.

sorry took me a little while to figure out how to upload an image, and yet I can't see it. argh.

I did ask around the village about parking etiquette and was told park where I want, it's my land and they're new (been here 4yrs) so ignore them. I just don't like not getting on with people. This is the first time in over 10 houses we've ever had a problem with neighbours.

Neighbour may 'like' to park via accessing your land, it doesn't mean she can.

They obviously had an issue with the previous owner and are carrying it over to the next. You need to grey rock these people and completely ignore them. I mean completely. Like just act like they don't exist. Do not engage at all. Ever. Then if they do continue to ramp up the bullying it becomes harassment and because you have never engaged they become the aggressors. Make them look like the unreasonable ones.

@cornflakecrunchie oh no. It's the pits. I take everything too personally and try and change to suit everyone. Time to put the big girl panties on and just please me and mine.

Hope yours settles down too.

Thanks everyone. I need to just get on with enjoying our home and garden. I do think we've moved into the twilight zone though as I've had the neighbours we get on with commenting on how dirty my car is and how we need to take our hanging baskets in and fix them as they look awful argh, I'd forgotten how bad little villages could be.

Get a Ring doorbell or outside security camera. They'll be less likely to harass you if they know they are being recorded.

You can't reason with the unreasonable. Save your breath.

How rotten for you OP. Stand your ground though, it sounds like they didn’t get anywhere with the previous owner so resistance will work. I approve of your plan to be nice to everyone else in the village. You’ll get all the village gossip that way too!

Stop trying to please them
you need to repeat this mantra to her 2 spaces 2 cars

Top diagram. Neigbour is a daft arse.

If I am reading your diagram correctly, it looks like you have parking for two cars and a dropped kerb to access it.

She has a space outside front of her house she can put her bins on, but no access to it from the road, thus no parking.

Her problem, tell her to stick it up her bum.

Could you not put a fence up between the houses so there is no question on what bit is your driveway? (with concrete posts to put them off hitting them with their car)

Thanks @Myrkk - I don't know why people think they can ride roughshod over us. Maybe we are just too reasonable - anything for peace & quiet.. We'll both have to do the big girl pants! All the best, I do hope things settle down.

They sound absolutely dreadful. You are doing nothing wrong so far as I can see. This sort of thing is so unnecessary.