My DC’s nanny is wonderfully warm and kind, and I’m incredibly grateful for the dedicated care she’s shown my children (and to me!). However, since having a conversation about helping DC1 become more independant to help ease the transition to preschool, she’s strangely started becoming more attached to him.
examples:
- starting to spoon feed him
- taking trips to the shops twice a week to buy new toys
- lying with him to fall asleep (for nap time)
- letting him touch her breasts and lift her shirt to see her bellybutton
When my DC was first learning to talk every woman was a “mama” and every man a “dada”. For mums of close friends he often calls them “mama <name>”. For some time he was calling both me and the nannying mama, and sometimes even his dad mama.
The nanny confided in me, before my DC was verbal, that she has a child she had as a teen who she co-raised with her mum/the child’s grandmother, and she still finds it hard that her own child doesn’t call her mum.
Now the nanny gets very awkward when my child calls her mama in front of me. I’m a bit baffled because to me he always calls her by her name. She doesn’t correct him and ask her to call her by her name.
I feel like I need to have a conversation about boundaries but need advice how to do this in a non-confrontational way