To think there needs to be a public inquiry into child development

[MaryMaryVeryContrary]

It really seems like we have a looming societal crisis in terms of child development and therefore the quality of the public in 10-20 years time. Experienced teachers across the board seem to be reporting an overwhelming increase in delayed, aggressive and disruptive children. I’m extremely worried about how this will impact society when they become adults - it seems (as a guess) at least a tenth of children will be incapable of work of any kind, and many more will need copious amounts of support to live any kind of responsible life.

AIBU to think we need an urgent public inquiry into this and what is going on? It seems to be the elephant in the room and anybody who tries to discuss it is shouted down.

I’m sure some of it is due to cuts in services but surely that can’t account for it all - it’s very sudden and extremely alarming.

Decline in quality of diet has lead to overall health and mental health tanking.

Take a look at Georgia Ede outlining the effects of our current diet on mental health. She does not explicitly say in this talk how it effects kids, but in her book she has some very striking anecdotes about how diet changes behavior in kids.

Apologises if mentioned already but the age people are having children has increased. I never really hear it mentioned much as a cause for why there could be an increase in ASD though it’s accepted that older parents are more likely to have children with issues.

Parents get off bloody tiktok and Parent your children ffs

Yes, I’ve looked into the studies around parental age and ASD (it’s quite well studied) and while there is a link, it’s a smallish one, and the ASD in the children is typical of what used to be called Asperger’s - higher functioning, usually quite bright, verbal but struggles with social communication. Not children with no speech, severe communication issues, explosive meltdowns and so on. In my tiny anecdata of the children I know who fit the latter profile, the parents are all in their 20s.

The diagnostic criteria for ASD was broadened and the thresholds became lower., particularly if using ICD criteria and not DSM.

Which is a contributing factor to the rise in child and adult diagnosis.

And the acute rise I referrals for ASC and ADHD assessments meant the NHS system couldn't cope so more inexperienced assessors in the NHS and poorer assessments from private assessments making ££££ happen.

Hitler had that idea of “Cleansing “ A T-4 programme of mass euthanasia of anyone not productive or who was mentally or physically Ill or disabled.

Shame he didn’t off himself eh.

Modern life is different for children today.
Society is letting kids down.

Cuts in services/lack of proper funding (NHS, education, Sure start etc)
A capitalist society where both parents have to work and are under financial pressures.
Cost of living crisis
An outdated, highly pressured education system which doesn’t allow for play and a proper childhood.

Too easy to put the blame on families when this government have trashed quality of life.

I know this might be an unpopular opinion, but I think it isn’t just the stress of life and full time work for both parents, but the whole world has changed in general that contributes to this decline in child mental health.

On the whole children don’t play outside as much anymore, they are more likely to play on their computer and partake in social media. Parents are super stressed at work and exhausted with general life, and so more likely to hand children a tablet during free time. I am not criticising - I am also guilty of this, and this seems to be the norm.

Because of this trend, children are more likely to have poor communication and attention skills as well as more aggression depending on what games they are exposed to. They are less likely to show the skills needed in school to be able to concentrate and learn, leading to general detachment from studies and general aggressive behaviour which might stem from frustration.

It sounds awful, but I am hoping that this is just a bad trend and that this would be investigated and rectified.

This garbage again, it always the parents fault isn't it. There's more non verbal children now as there's next to zero nhs salt intervention. Nhs salt discharged my son at 5, as they couldn't support him further apparently. We asked for an alternative communication aid which they refused. The school did nothing either. He only started communicating functionally when we decided to home school and implement the communication aid ourselves. The system is a disgrace and it makes children more disabled than they should be. For the record he doesn't watch TV at all and believe it or not I talk and spend time with him all day everyday. Not all parents with special needs children neglect them.

I can only comment about the children I know so that makes my response purely qualitative. I have a couple of friends with teenagers and they both have had struggles with their mental health. I think lockdown contributed to this, one missed out on a smooth transition from primary to secondary school and the other was awarded their CCSEs by assessment and this impacted on their already shaky self esteem. Both of them have had to wait an incredibly long time to be seen by CAMHS which does not help matters. We need to really invest in the mental wellbeing of our young people I think all children and indeed most adults' mental health took a major hit during the pandemic and we are seeing the consequences now. Another friend has an almost 3 year old who is just an utter delight, full of fun and hitting all their milestones and my neighbours has three little ones who all seem to be fine. I think the use of screens and smart phones does impact on the formation of neural pathways at crucial stages of development but that is just my opinion and sometimes I wonder if it is just me being old fashioned. I do think that parenting in this day and age is very challenging

This is controversial but I think we have very low expectations for our children a lot of the time and we never allow them to be bored so when there is a bit of a lull they don’t know what to do with themselves and so create havoc instead.

We go to quite an old fashioned church. There is no Sunday school so all the children attend with their parents from babyhood and without fail they are all able to sit on their seat and quietly colour in/ fiddle with a few toys for an hour by the time they are 5 (even the ND kids like my son) because that is what is expected of them all their life and they’ve practiced it every week from birth. Afterwards they have to interact with people of all ages and backgrounds who come and speak to them so they learn social skills from that too.
Less and less people go to church now and even then most churches have children’s sections but I can’t really think of any other environment where kids can learn this. Even when I was at school there were more opportunities to learn this as my daughter’s school doesn’t even have assemblies anymore and they are rarely sitting at a desk. Now kids are never expected to be bored as if there is any down time then they are given a phone to amuse them as many kids seem to get anxious and don’t know what to do with themselves otherwise.
We also have more stuff and expectations even from 30 years ago. Things that would have been a treat are now just expectations so I think some kids are genuinely shocked if they are told no to something so kick off.

One of my dc was diagnosed with ASD and in urgent need of SALT. We had to wait 6 months for the initial assessment - this was 18 months ago and still waiting for a block of therapy. We were told they don’t go into schools either now. Same with OT - we’ve been waiting 12 months - so this won’t be helping dc as the problem is nationwide with waiting times. Not to even mention the CAMHS crisis

I think modern parenting has contributed to the milder issues. Agree with the comments about never being bored, rarely being told no. Parents seem to feel the need to explain their every tiny decision to their toddlers who must be utterly bemused.

I find parents will also do anything to avoid meltdowns. Distraction, giving them something else, redirecting them etc - it’s never simply a ‘no’ so they know they’ve done wrong or can’t have something.

Sure Start was brilliant, my ex had a niece who went to her local one with her little one and it totally changed her and the way she inteacted with her child. She made friends and became far more confident and her parenting benefitted. If they had been around when I was a young mum I would have been there regularly.

My neighbours have a three year old and she’s been sung to and spoken to so much every day by her parents ( Both work)
They have a second child and are always talk to the children- it’s lovely to hear.
Little girl has great vocabulary abs is bilingual.
No screens there used as dummies to keep kids quiet.
Screens are really bad for kids in my opinion

I agree with this and everything else on the thread.

IMP most of it is shitty parenting/absent parenting (eg too much time in childcare) and screens.

the number of babies who are forward facing in a buggy and the parent pushing has earphones in…and wonder why there is a speech delay?! No one is ever told no, parents can’t take any perceived criticism of themselves and their child.

I don’t agree re sleep though OP; the idea that children and babies should sleep through the night is a few hundred years old.
biologically they aren’t supposed to for a while.

Thanks I’ll have a watch later. There is a lot of junk added to food now and an awful lot of parents seem to have got themselves in a rut of feeding their kids beige freezer food.

Couldn’t agree more. I’ve just been on holidays and witnessed a family at the pool. 5 adults and a child aged mono more than 2. Adults all lying on loungers, child watching something on a phone…he was absolutely crying out for attention and just some interaction. Every adult he approached “go and see your mum” child went to mum “go and see your dad” child went to dad “see nana” and on and on it went.
I wish I could say it was the only family like this we saw but it was more the norm than the exception.

Yes tech has its place, but it was a crying shame…no wonder children don’t know how to interact with the world when those who are supposed to teach them don’t bother their arse

Can't access the BMJ, do you have the text please?

Quite a lot of people don’t seem to realise neurodivergence's are hereditary and that autistic people can and do have children - and your chance of having a child with a ND is almost as high as 50% in some cases, especially when ND people have children with ND people - which they often do and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with that.

IMO screens are a real issue, especially for the ND. I work with under 5’s with Autism. I work with 2 kids who never don’t have a screen. They take it everywhere and meltdown if the battery dies. The parents look at me like I’ve suggested murdering a kitten when I mention trying to reduce their screen time.

Exhausted adults probably working full time so really need that rest which then impacts the child. Having a sahp if that’s what the family want to do shouldn’t be discouraged and punished but a valid choice

@Packingcubesqueen I agree. On the school run I frequently see toddlers sat in buggies holding phones and watching YouTube on them. It's very sad and it's scary how common it is. It can't be good for them.

Do any of them have no screens at all?

The holiday thing is the worst. Toddlers on the beach on an iPad like come The fuck on the activity is the beach! Parents drinking and on phone/reading whilst not supervising. It’s really awful/sad.