To think friend was thoughtless?

[burnat34]

I’m trying to be less sensitive.

I’ve struggled with my weight largely due to mental health. I let myself get too big and ignored it but now I’m doing something about it.

Told this to my friend and she said she’d felt the same with low motivation but at least she has her boyfriend to make her healthy dinners and it must be harder for me as I’m alone.

I kind of felt 😕. This isn’t the first time she’s made comments about her having a partner and how I’m single. She was even surprised I decorated at Christmas because it’s just me in the house.

For reference she’s also lived alone for maybe 3 years so she’s not naive to how it can be.

Yes, thoughtless, but see it as reflecting her own issues, and not any reflection on you. I mean, DH is the cook in this household and I know I eat a lot less when he’s not around, because I make much simpler food for myself, and default to apples, cereal and cheese if I can’t be bothered. I would probably be thinner if single.

Best wishes with the weight loss.

That’s worse than thoughtless. Sorry OP. It’s snide and cruel.

No you are not being unreasonable, it was an intentional snide comment.

I remember after finding out my partner of 7 years had been cheating on me struggling so badly with my weight and mental health.
I text my best friend saying how low I felt and that I was planning a Saturday night out with other friends. We had a brief text conversation then she ended it by saying “Sorry I need to go, DH wants to snuggle and watch a film, I can’t imagine how horrible it must be to have to go out on a weekend desperately trying to find a man for company”

This was 15 years ago and we are still best friends, I excused it because she’s autistic and can be blunt. Recently there have been similar stealth brags but this time it’s about how she’s in a MUCH better position financially. She’s a single parent and I’ve been with DP over 10 years and happy.
I’m a bit tired of worrying about buying food for the week and hearing about how well off she is.

I’m not bitter, I love nothing more for my friends to be happy, I genuinely hate the fact that I feel envy sometimes. But I’m old enough now not to be naive and not recognise an insensitive comment for what it is.

Ugh, that was a bitchy comment. Did she split from her DH then?

I agree with the above - it’s more than just thoughtless comments, they’re deliberately cruel remarks made to belittle you.

Wow … that’s awful. Doesn’t matter how long ago it was. That’s just terrible behaviour.

I’ve also always found it odd to show off about wealth. Realistically if you’re friends with someone you’ll know if they are wealthy just by how they live their life. You really don’t need to explicitly say.