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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be annoyed at friend for ‘fat’ comment?

30 replies

fairymar · 17/05/2024 21:21

Currently in my 3rd trimester of my first pregnancy. I’ve had a pretty tough time due to many complications and as a result I’m a bit emotionally fragile. Hence my AIBU.

It’s lovely hot weather here at the moment and my supposed best friend text me saying ‘how are you enjoying the weather, fatty?’. I of course know I’m not fat but I found it very offensive and upsetting. I replied ‘oh, that’s rude’ but wish I hadn’t replied at all!

This friend had a child a few years ago and was incredibly self conscious and insecure regarding her body image and weight gain so I was shocked she’d make a comment like this, even in jest.

AIBU to be upset by this?

OP posts:
CorpusInterruptus · 18/05/2024 01:07

Sounds like she’s shit at reading the room. Were you tempted to respond with ‘not too bad, it’s no fun carrying extra baggage in this heat, is it?!’

Sibs10 · 18/05/2024 01:10

After your update- she either doesn't take on board when you don't find a certain joke very funny, or is doing in on purpose. YANBU.

StellaLaBella · 18/05/2024 01:15

Zanatdy · 17/05/2024 23:24

Chill, she didn’t mean to be offensive. Poor choice of word but I’m sure no bad intent was there

Not sure I would be, she sounds quite catty tbh.

Did she respond OP?

yellowsmileyface · 18/05/2024 09:40

fairymar · 17/05/2024 21:41

I think it’s bugged me so much because she has form for putting me and others down and I know that she would be very upset if someone said this to her so why say it to someone else

Sounds like she has a lot of deep seated insecurities herself and makes herself feel better by bringing others down. Doesn't sound like much of a friend!

Jokes like this are fine if you're both close enough and know that you share this sense of humour, but it sounds like you've been friends for a while and she should know you don't find it funny. It sounds like a very purposeful attempt to put you down.

Hellodollydaydream · 26/07/2024 18:06

first World problems eh🤦‍♂️

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