Neighbour texts everyday if daughter can come eound

[Bloodyfreezinng]

My neighbour is very vulnerable she is a sweet woman but had a troubled past. Daughter comes round ours for hours and her mum doesn’t even ask her to come home for dinner or anything.

Everyday I get a text can she come round to play. How the hell can I say no in a nice way? Some days we just wanted to chill as a family and we can’t.

"Sorry no, having a quiet day today"

Be grateful she's just a nice sweet person, maybe a bit hopeless. My lovely neighbour has smashed up my car with a brick and knifed the soft top, assaulted my husband and is continuing to harass my husband despite having been summoned to court.

Just say you are busy, or daughter has lots of homework, or that one of you has D&V.

Surely you can send the child home for her dinner?

Edited to add: Looney that is shocking.

This-don’t make it complicated.

Invite her over when you want her over and if/when you do, give the mum a time to come and collect or say you’ll bring her home at x time.

It is so tedious when this happens. I had it for years a neighbour seeing me come in from work and straight away sending her kids to my house. In the end I just locked the door and told them we were busy and continued saying it almost every day till she got the hint. Apparently she liked to send her kids to me (single parent) so her husband could come in from work and have his dinner in silence.

Just say “sorry we’re busy tonight, have a nice Weekend”

Keep it pleasant but you don’t need to give details or make excuses and tie yourself in knots.

“No, not today”

repeat ad infinitum till the hint is got. Don’t say sorry, because you shouldn’t be apologising for politely saying no.
i used to have this with a neighbour too except without the benefit of a text, the kid saw us come home and appeared at the door

"No, but she's welcome on Monday after school"

Which not only says no for now, but also gives you a few days free and an actually planned time for her to come over.

See also:
"NeighbourtChild, time for you to head home; DD, time to set the table for dinner, please."

Some days we just wanted to chill as a family and we can’t.

Eh! Of course you can. You just tell/ text the mother back, that it cannot happen today.

No not today . Then if you like the girl coming round say someone like Tuesday is good for me, .does the girl .have other services involved or has she gone unnoticed ?

I don't think you need to say sorry you have nothing to be sorry for.

Apparently she liked to send her kids to me (single parent) so her husband could come in from work and have his dinner in silence.

@Psychoticbreak What a nerve , it never fails to annoy me how poorly so many women treat other women for the benefit of their men 😐 they think an unrelated female relative or acquaintance (often single ) can be inconvenienced but not their own husband.

A friend of mine used to borrow money from me for things to do with her kids. I always said she didn’t have to pay it back - and she never did which was fine, but my issue was I found out she also used to lend her partner/father of her kids money for his weed.

The answer to her financial issues was clear to me - her partner should step up and be a responsible father and stop the weed. Instead, she chose to ask me for money frequently . I stopped lending /giving her money after that.

We're a bit busy tonight/for the next few days/for the next couple of weeks.
Hope you have a good weekend.

Start charging her for babysitting and food.

I honestly can't believe the amount of posts like this. IF A CHILD IS BEING NEGLECTED AND YOU ARE AWARE OF IT THEN CONTACT SOMEONE. If you dont want to then PM me and i will do it!

In what way is she vulnerable? If it is a safe guarding issue then clearly you should be reporting to someone (school etc) if she isn't being asked home for dinner.

It really isnt hard to just say no.

• No not today, but, hope you guys are all well.
• No we just want to chill as a family.
• No (child) doesn't fancy playing today.
• (child) has homework so isnt around

And to answer your question OP maybe say something like “ aw not today. I’ll think of a day next week we are free and she can come over then. I’ll text you when I’ve decided what day works for us”

basically try and hint from now on she’ll be coming over around once a week at most,

It is difficult though , given you say she’s so vulnerable and I assume on her own…is there any local services in the area she could be signposted to?