AIBU to attend the wrong church because I like it more?

[LuckyRubberDucky]

Having a bit of an existential crisis here. I used to be a regular church goer, was raised attending mass on Sundays. During covid we moved to a new area and didn’t attend mass at all. When the churches properly started up again, I tried attending my new local mass and it just doesn’t fit. I’ve gone from a church I’ve known all my life, attending with one small child who everyone knew, to a church I don’t like. The church in my new area is very solemn, very quiet. Previously I was attending with one baby, I now have two children, one of whom has ASD and can’t sit still or quietly. The church doesn’t fit us, and they only do one mass a week on a Sunday so can’t even attend without the kids.

Then today I’ve been on a school trip to a new church. It’s not my religion (think CoE versus Catholic) but it felt so lovely! The priest was so warm and welcoming. They were lovely with all the children running around. I spoke to them briefly about not liking my church and was told they’d welcome me with open arms. The problem is, it’s not my religion! I’d be raising my kids a different faith to me, just for convenience? Also, one of my children is baptised, the other isn’t (covid). Can I get them baptised to the ‘wrong’ religion? I’m not sure I believe it matters, but does it?

Do actually mean a different religion or just different denomination? A Baptist church/ evangelical church/ free church etc are all still part of the Christian religion vs eg catholic. Just do what feels right for you.

I suppose it depends how seriously you take your Catholicism, and how you feel about key doctrinal differences. There’s a difference between sitting in o a weekly service because your children can be noisy and your actual be,Ives, and whether you would actually baptise your unbaptised child into a different faith to his/her sibling. What about school admissions, later on, if they attend faith schools and might not be eligible for the same ones?

I don't understand how it's different to your religion if it's Christian. What denomination was it?

@IvyGrippedtheSteps we are very rural. There’s on primary school and one secondary and neither are religious schools (although they learn about many faiths).

Go to where you feel happiest

I suppose it depends if there are bits of the religion that you don’t agree with.

You are being called to that place of worship for a reason. 🙂

I'll use that the next time I get drawn to the pub after work.

I'm atheist now but grew up RC, I always remember the newsletter having a slogan we welcome people of all faith and no faith. Go where you feel
Comfortable.

Yay! I think it sounds great

C of E and the RC Church (plus a whole bunch of others) all recognise baptism in the Trinitarian tradition - in addition, the CofE has open communion, rather than closed to only baptised Catholics. Somebody who was baptised in the CofE, for example, could then take first holy communion and confirmation in the RC church without any requirement for RC baptism. They wouldn't be catholic until that point, but their baptism itself is recognised - sort of like an ecumenical passport.

The difficulty would come if you want your children to take FHC, as that's not available in the CofE and the differences in rituals, rites/sacraments (fewer) and (no) Holy Days of Obligation.

I've had a similar dilemma - raised fundy Christian and now part of a lovely CofE church family.
You aren't baptising your dch into a sect, but into a faith - Christianity. It's like reading a book in two different languages - it's still roughly the same book.

God is God.
I was confirmed C of E.
One of my best friends in Catholic one is Mormon.
We all attend the Spiritualist Church.
We respect each others beliefs.

Go a few times and see how it feels. Surely it's better to attend a church that you feel right in?

What are the two religions?

I also go to a different denomination to the one I grew up in because I was looking for active, fun Sunday schools when DD was 4. I still have concerns about CofE being an arm of the state but the move has been so positive. Lovely people, loads of activities and volunteering opportunities, just great. Go for it OP. You won't regret it.

I think the OP meant "denominations", and not religions.

I'm assuming you mean a different denomination and not a different religion? But you will find there are differences , even within Christian denominations. It is really a matter of whether you can accept the differences in what you believe and how that manifests itself in day to day living, services etc.

Please go to the church you feel comfortable with. The vicar sounds lovely.
Similar story. I had attended the city cathedral forever before moving overseas. Never felt that welcome there but I used to be a chorister as a teenager (a time plagued by bullying and un-christian behavior tbh). I moved back a year ago after my beloved gran died and I have started going to the church where we had her funeral. To cut a long story short, it’s where she attended when her family were young. Like you, the priest welcomed me with open arms and is now a very close friend. I love going there. Please PM me if you want to share experiences. God bless.

If the other church feels welcoming and you feel you could be at home there then why not attend a few services and see how you feel after a while - look up their doctrines and see if you could align your faith with them (it may not be a perfect fit but we are allowed to question and work through things we struggle with in christianity and no church is perfect anyway). See how the children's work encourages and supports its children nd get to know some of the families. We attend a different denomination to the one I grew up in - my family were in this particular denomination for generations and we have generations of church leaders tracing back a long long time...but in the end it wasn't the right place for us as a family and there were some aspects that didn't sit right with me on deeper reflection, there's a part of me that will always have a heart for that church and the grounding it gave me but it is OK to move on and find a new spiritual home. If the teaching is sound and the people are friendly and open nothing wrong in attending there - just remember not to go in with the thinking that it is a perfect place...it definitely won't be . Hope you find what you are searching for in drawing closer to God OP.

It's depends which way you go. C of e accept all Christian baptism confirmation weddings etc, Catholics only their own. Cannon law I think.

I would definitely go to the church you're happiest at and consider converting if you want to be there long term. It's still the same Jesus that you're celebrating and learning from! People change denominations all the time (usually when they want to marry someone who has a serious role in the other church and they want to go together).

I'm glad you found a lovely one!

Actually I might be wrong about Catholics reading above! I just know that you can't be a godparent to a Catholic child unless you're Catholic baptized or converted yourself

Over the years I tried many different churches (in the denomination I was brought up in) and I didn't find any quite the right fit.
By chance I went to an event at a CofE and found it so inspiring and welcoming that I started attending regularly. There are some customs I don't fully get but in the end we all have the same main goal of loving God and each other.
I also had my daughter baptised there so we too have different denominations. Just go where feels right!

Also at my mums church they have many Sikhs and Muslims who attend regularly as they like the community and support it provides.

We are all from the same loaf, as my friend stated when attending a different church.