To be terrified of dementia?

[Frightenedallthetime]

Looking for a hand hold please. I have a very strong family history of dementia (Grandparent, Uncle and now recently diagnosed parent - all the same blood line) and am terrified that I will also be affected.

I've looked up things and done research to try and ascertain my risk, Although not late onset it was not considered early onset so late 60's early 70's, so the research suggests it isn't hereditary, but surely so many in one family can't be a coincidence?

I am nearly 40 and find myself forgetting small things like saying I'll text someone and forgetting for example. I have young children and therefore am pretty busy as well as visiting and dealing with logistics for my poorly parent, so there is a lot of stress in my life.

Not sure what I'm asking from this post really but I am so so worried. It's taking over my life.

It's absolutely normal to forget things.

It is very unlikely to be the start of dementia - more likely you are too busy and dropping some balls!

This page might be helpful.

alzheimer.ca/en/about-dementia/do-i-have-dementia/differences-between-normal-aging-dementia

I'm so sorry you're struggling with this. I don't know your risk but I know that dementia is fairly common so it could be purely coincidental that three of your relatives have had it.
In terms of the anxiety, I think you should seek help. If you do get dementia you still have 30 years of good life ahead of you so focus on enjoying your life. None of us know what will happen. Someone could spend years obsessing about dementia then get cancer and die in their 40s - or they might live in excellent health until 100. Who knows? Worrying changes nothing. I say this as someone who had cancer when my children were young and wasted years worrying about all the what ifs.
Also, there's a hell of a lot of research in to dementia. I imagine that in 30 years there will be better treatment options.
Regarding your current forgetfulness, this is perfectly normal with small children. I remember paying for my shopping and walking out of the shop, leaving my bags there. Putting milk in to the cupboard etc.
Just to warn you, you're likely to get more forgetful over the next decade or so. I'm currently perimenopausal and have terrible brain fog. It really feels like dementia sometimes! I have to triple check everything I do because I'm making so many careless mistakes. So please don't panic if you become forgetful throughout your 40s.

My DH is suffering from Lewy Body Dementia. OP there is very limited evidence that dementia is in anyway hereditary. Forgetting small things is very normal. We started to get worried about DH when he was losing things every time he put them down and (as is common with dementia), leaving them in unusual places.

If my experience has taught me anything it is that while you are fit and well you should make the best of your life. Worry less and live more.