To not have imagined a 1/2/3 year old

[whatithought]

When I had my first baby, I imagined them as a baby, the classes and the mum friends and pram walks. And I imagined them older. Teaching them about the world, about other countries and cultures and reading books and about types of birds and wildlife.

I did not picture 1/2/3.

I wonder if that was self preservation

anyone else?

Lol I'm the same, curre try in the baby stage and have no idea what to expect of the next few years!

I loved the toddler stage. I think it’s the most adorable age. I liked the baby stage and preschooler stage too, but toddlers are just so dinky and cute.

I agree I was the same.

But I adore the toddler stage as you start your see the emergence of their personality.

(I had easy toddlers)

Do you mean you pictured a baby and an older child but not the in between?

Yes.

I think my instincts knew something

I honestly never pictured or picture anything about my kids but I am autistic so perhaps that is unusual.

I will say though that I much prefer the 2-6 stage than the 0-2 period though. My eldest is about to turn 6 so not sure what it will be like beyond that.

I know what you mean but that was because I didn’t know much about kids between the age of them walking and going to school. I didn’t even know the terms Terrible Twos and Threenager.

Agree with this. Tantrums don't bother me. I just join in 😅

Reading this thread just as one of my toddlers - with a scowly look on her face - hands me her cup. It has traces of beans on, and has to be washed. My wiping it, from a seated position, will not suffice (as I've previously learned).

There may be something in your theory. Did you imagine having a teenager who tells you they find you weird and embarassing because you have friendly chats with customer service personnel? Because that's my current reality.

Terrible twos
Threenager
Fuking hell Fours

🤣

I think I mainly imagined the older stages and not the toddler / baby times at all!

I imagined first days at school and the like, I think

Toddlers (12-36 months) are hard work but cute and fine. Pre schoolers (3-5) are absolutely savage. If I’d had imagined them I might have been sterilised 🙃

Wait until you meet your teenagers....You'll be all misty eyed about the terrible twos!

I know them so much now 😂

I don’t know … I’d say they start to be a bit exhausting at 18 months

I often say this when friends were making their return to work /SAHM /grandparents doing childcare plans when they had a 5/6 month old who could perhaps crawl a bit but mainly stayed put and slept in the day, the reality of a 1.5 - 3 year old, moving, not sleeping, not happily sitting on your knee when you drink a coffee with your friends etc - it’s so much harder!

similarly - we have friends who’d bought a house out in the countryside, which was fine when their dcs were at primary and they dropped the kids at childcare on their way to work, picked them up on the way back, then found secondary school issues around there not being school buses that went their way, no after school club for kids to wait in until parents could pick them up, causing massive headaches and limited which secondary schools they could apply for without one parent having to be available everyday. some parents just can’t think what the next stage will be like and seem to be only able to plan for the stage they are facing now.

(on the other hand, I’m now at the teenage stage and I just assumed this would be hard hats on all round- but so far, teens are lovely and you get to watch sweary things as a family rather than Disney. I hadn’t pictured how much food we would need though.)

Toddlers are too cute for words - way better than babies who cry all the time for reasons only known to themselves, and never sleep.

Toddlers are brilliant! They're honestly so much fun - you're in for a treat!

Another here who loves 1 / 2 / 3 year olds! Mainly they're cute and entertaining, but if they fo start to frazzle you, they can be placed in their cots to calm down for 10 minutes! They are too small to get out. Tantrums in the supermarket? They plug into little seats, purposefully designed to stop them from escaping. Much easier than dealing with tantruming adults at work

You must know some teeny three year olds.

I'd imagined having a not very interesting and very dependent baby, and more interesting, older children with interests / hobbies / things. They would have been around 8-11, I guess. I didn't really think about having toddlers or young children, or teenagers or adult children. I guess I just wasn't that familiar with kids.

I adore 2 and 3 yr olds, if you could hand me a 2 yr old (who sleeps through the night) i would have a 3rd dc but not fussed with doing pregnancy and babies again. they go from whacking you round the head to giving you kisses in 2 seconds flat. Demanding a snack to demanding cuddle. Their little hand in yours. Yes they’re undoubtedly hard work but their little faces, and personalities and the way they think they’re so funny and the giggles, oh the giggles! Still hard work tho!

Toddler stage was so much better for me. They slept and weren’t attached to my boob constantly.

This made me laugh! My teens are the same. They don’t understand why I am ‘so friendly to randoms’. Miserable gits.

I’m told they emerge from the teenage years as compassionate human beings who think about something other than themselves and tiiktok.

We live in hope.