How do I stop my kids (2 and 4) running around / away from me ?

[gaddi]

How do I actually do this ? I feel exposed when I am out alone with them. They think it's fun.

I avoid situations like this, but it happens sometimes, like at school pick up.

I braved going out to a pub for lunch alone with them yesterday. We sat in pickup benches and they got up a few times and thought it was hilarious to run around, away from me.

I had to chase them and just grab them both. It wasn't unsafe. But what if this happens on a road ?

The same thing happens today at pick up.

My 4 year old is fine on her own and doesn't run off, but when her brother starts doing it, she thinks it's hilarious and joins in.

I avoid this by putting the little one in the buggy. So maybe the answer is to just keep him firmly in there. I did this at the pub, until we had to go to the loo and he didn't want to sit in his buggy after.

anyway, before you start coming at me, we were at the pub at 12 pm, it was empty outside, so we didn't disturb anyone.

any advice ?

Make it clear if they run off you you go home

And follow through

Reins and buggy

Bribe the 4YO. Sitting nicely, listening to mummy etc gets to order an ice cream at the pub after they’ve had lunch. I probably wouldn’t take them out to eat solo if they’re not very used to restaurants. Build up by doing it more as a foursome so they know exactly what it is expected. Take a yummy snack they can have for leaving the park nicely. Pushchair is your friend with the younger one. Any running away, not listening and they get strapped it, doesn’t matter if they’re kicking and screaming. 4YO gets their warning that it’s almost time to go as the youngest is being manhandled! It’s old enough to understand that it’s dangerous to run away and if they don’t leave nicely I’d expect consequences at home eg loss of TV time.

Reins.

My kids are the same age and my 2yr old did manage to run onto the road before I caught him and it's a busy road. It was pure luck nothing was coming or he wouldve been a goner.

I bought reigns. He wore them once, hated them and now I just take them with me so if he refuses to hold my hand I say "if you don't hold my hand, I will put the bag on" and he usually just gives me his hand. He walked nice as pie today :D

That's good ! Thank god nothing happened to him ! They're just so unaware at 2.

I have a backup with reins on it. I'll start using it more. I keep him in the buggy a lot, especially when we are out with 4 year old.

But when I drop her at preschool, he walks down the path with me ( thankfully no cars ) and it's usually a palaver. He just runs off. If 4 year old is there too, it gets pretty annoying.

I take them out to eat a fair bit. They're usually fine, as long as they're contained and not able to just get up from the table. Picnic benches are not a good idea.

Picnics in safe spaces, enclosed parks. Practice allowing them some freedom in a safer space first, it is important that they learn to hold a hand. Change up buggy, reins, scooter for the 4 Yr old.
Take another adult with you to help them stay safe. Older kids are also great for this they love holding big cousin/ neighbour's hand.
Nothing encourages children to run like an open space!

Mine were the same and I’d just avoid places where I couldn’t keep them safe.

4yo tried it once on the school field and I just carried on to the exit and without reacting (he couldn’t have got out). He freaked out and never did it again!

Reins, buggy or little backpack with lead attached for parent control.
And speak firmly about road safety. Every single time.

Yeah that's been my general approach.

I don't like taking them to play grounds and I don't really need to as we have a big garden with everything anyway.

When does it get better?? I guess when the little one is 3 or 4 ?

I find it easier now the eldest won’t run, I just keep some form of contact with the youngest “hold my hand or I hold your hood” seems to work.

As an alternative approach you could teach STOP! ?
Play it as a game everywhere, begin at home.
Whenever you shout/say/whisper stop they must stand very still looking in your direction... Then treat with - praise, small prizes dare I say it sweets 🙈 encourage good behaviour and even a star chart for the STOP competition between siblings.
When STOP is established begin with Come which they must return immediately for game purposes you can add different actions... Arms up, crouch down, and so on to release there must be GO.
For context I have looked after many children as a childminder/nanny/nursery officer and a mum of 4 ( my beautiful blended family) .
Just thought I would share 🤩

Theres 15 months between my two and when they were that age I stuck them on leashes like puppies.

Reins.

Best thing ever for keeping a pair of slippery little fuckers away from danger.

I wouldn't take kids of that age on my own out for lunch unless it was to a play cafe. Not enjoyable for me or my kids.

2yo is often in the buggy or on reins when out, depends on the situation. Basically always have the buggy with me even when he's not so if he runs off or causes a problem I give him a warning that he is going to have to go in th buggy if he doesn't stop and I follow through if that happens.

Mostly we go to kid friendly places though like parks, fenced in playgrounds, playgroups where youngest can't open the doors to get out, same with soft play and so on. So not a big issue really.

Reins as already suggested.