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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Gap year travel and introvert

5 replies

Vikalex · 12/05/2024 12:18

My DD is 18. She has inheritance from my parents. She is doing her A-levels and has decided she wants a gap year. When my parents passed all their assets skipped a generation so DD has effectively trust fund level money set aside for her, most will go on a house for her and uni costs but she has enough to have some fun.
DD is a bit of an introvert, well somewhere in between, she loves her friends and is ok meeting new people but it's important to her she has time alone and she is just as content in her own company as with friends. She doesn't have loads of friends just a few very close friends and is happy with this.
In July she's spending a few weeks in Italy with a friend, they are staying in hotels as both think hostel culture is not for them.
In September she's going to New York with her dad for 3 weeks.
After this DD wants to do some bucket-list holidays on her own, staying in hotels etc.
She's thinking

  • Some other US cities
  • Australia over Christmas
  • South Africa
  • Europe on and off through the spring

Now I think that she should probably get some work experience in during the gap year which she agrees with but I worry all the solo travelling will be very very lonely.
DD has joked that if she wants dinner company she will just go on tinder and arrange a date, but that just makes me more nervous!!
I think travelling totally alone, not in hostels with lots of other people will get lonely and sad.
She loves reading, art and history, so thinks she will just spend her days in museums or on beach's/in parks. She says she is happy to eat in restaurants alone too.

AIBU to think this sounds very isolating? I'm worried she will get lonely?
Anyone have any ideas of ways she could get travel in without having to be in hostels or totally alone?

OP posts:
Allthesea · 12/05/2024 12:48

What about a gap year travel company like Raleigh international? She could travel on afterwards independently or maybe with new friends made in expedition?

If an expedition isn’t her thing (although I truly believe this sort of experience is amazing personal development for everyone) she could do a shorter more holiday style group trip with a company like g-adventures or the adventure people?

InSpainTheRain · 12/05/2024 12:51

Honestly it sounds fine to me. Surely if she needs company she can find some. Some of us love being on our own and doing what we want, rather than being in a group. The gap year companies all sound awful in my view!

NuffSaidSam · 12/05/2024 12:51

Surely if she starts out on this path and decides she doesn't like it she'll just change her plans? Switch from hotel it hostel? Or join a tour group?

Unless she has an intellectual disability I'd keep your nose out and let her plan what she wants.

ButterCrackers · 12/05/2024 12:55

Doing a language course could be a good idea as she’ll meet people where she’s staying. It could be two weeks every afternoon basic level at a college in the city she’s visiting for example. Volunteering is another good one.

GaspingGekko · 12/05/2024 13:33

I travelled alone for 2 years after uni OP. If your DD feels lonely at any point she will be able to meet people on the travel scene. Sounds like an amazing chance for her to go do this.

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