AIBU to accept to feel so hopeless surrounding my binge eating

[Glucose95]

Hi all,
it took a lot of courage to write about this so please be kind…

Throughout my life I have always struggled with food. Maybe due to childhood trauma - not sure - but I can remember using food as a coping mechanism for stress since I was about 10.

I am late 20s now and have endured years of my weight up-young from about 10 stone to 19 stone.

I did so well throughout 2023, avoided UPF, stuck to mainly natural foods and brisk walked daily. My weight was about 11 stones in November.

Fast forward to today, and I am now back at 16 stones and my weight is only going up. I am binging on so much sugary food, just as a coping mechanism for stress. Like, when I am stressed I may go for chocolate. The problem is though, when I do it is not just one bar I go for, I often eat about 8 in one sitting.

I know it is all due to stress, but I can’t help but thinking how much it causes me to spiral in general. When I am the weight I am now I have less confidence (eg won’t take photos etc) and feel lower than I would be if I was back at where I was last year. All my nice clothes are at a smaller weight as I don’t want to buy new clothes as I am now as I don’t want to stay here. It just spirals….

Does anyone else use food as a coping mechanism for stress, and if so please could you share strategies for getting past this?

I just feel so hopeless about myself (eg weight) when I go through one of these binging periods.

Are there NHS services for this type of eating?

I heard someone speak on the radio and describe their situation (which totally resonated with mine) and it was described as “binge eating disorder”.

I never really saw myself as having an eating disorder before, but the more I think about it the more it makes sense…

Will I be stuck in this constant state of flux with my weight throughout my life?

I worry that it won’t be a long life with all of the health complications that eating so much sugar can bring…

I am on Wegovy and it has helped my bingeing. I have lost three stone on it too. I also completely cut out dairy from my diet previous to this and that helped a lot too. I stopped drinking alcohol as well as that triggered bingeing. It is a really hard thing to stop though. The Wegovy has helped more than anything else, but it is expensive unfortunately.

I am in recovery from binge eating but I think I only got there by engaging in CBT about my childhood trauma and also managing stress responses. I had severe OCD and anxiety over the years and binge eating they all overlapped so treating some of these helped to treat binge eating as I was taught coping mechanisms. I was not able to find specific binge eating counselling but I went to CBT anyway and it really did help. I accept I could have a relapse back into binging but every day that I don’t relapse is a positive, the same way I don’t smoke anymore and I don’t use alcohol as a coping strategy.

the way I see it is that if we are not taught how to cope with feelings as a child we will find our own ways but they can be destructive, so you have to do CBT to re-parent yourself back onto learning healthy coping mechanisms. Through therapy I changed other things about my life, like I cut off or limited contact with my parents as this was continually triggering me.

good luck x

Hi OP, my cousin was in a similar position to you and has been taking ozempic since Feb. Not only has she lost loads of weight, but she said the biggest positive is that it has silenced all the ‘food noise’ in her head. She is no longer constantly thinking about the next thing she is going to eat, no longer unable to resist over eating, no longer influenced by other people eating. She is finally happy and a healthy weight after 20 years.

The problem with ozempic is that it is not permanent. The feeling only lasts as long as you take it. I have tried this drug and in all honesty it was great in terms of ‘food noise’ but it’s just a temporary solution to lose weight it is not therapy or life long changes, if you have to stop taking it (as I did, it made me unwell with gallbladder colic) all the previous feelings return to you. I would be wary of using this drug in isolation to try to cure an eating disorder as there is no support or therapy that comes with it.

Watch Georgia Ede on YouTube, she explains really clearly how what you eat effects how you feel.

Please do NOT recommend Ozempic for someone with childhood trauma and Binge Eating DISORDER.

As per my previous post, please explore CBT for binge eating disorder.

Do not take Ozempic.

Lots of replies now, @Glucose95!

Thanks for posting OP, you have begun a good and useful discussion.

I have struggled with disordered eating as a coping mechanism for stress but over 10 years and a chronic illness which means it can be hard to exercise, this has meant that I have put on a lot of weight. I also have childhood trauma as well.

I really feel this carrying of extra weight in my joints now, knees and hips are creaky and complaining. Beginning arthritis, and I know this can be relieved by up to 50% by reducing my size but it is hard once your brain is wired into a certain pattern around food. But not impossible.

As you said, it's not good for our bodies/health long term. I'd like to find a way to reduce my size.

Following with interest!

I struggle too. My best strategies
1 have lots of healthy food about
2 cook from scratch where possible
3 no ice cream, cake, biscuits, crisps in the house as much as possible
4 nuts/bananas to snack on
5 cooking ingredients so I can make a cake in a mug cake etc if I really need to and don't go to the shop
6 continue COVID rules and do occasional big shops at the supermarket not lots of little ones

I don't always follow them but I try